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Post by Pretty Little Boother on Mar 2, 2024 21:41:59 GMT
Did anyone see this?
Two blokes were wildly swinging at each other and one of them got absolutely haymakered in the gob.
One of them was accusing the other of farting horrifically and repeatedly.
Anyway, it was me, I didn't say anything at the time because I was scared and it was funny, but sorry lads, I was the phantom farter of Block 28, I'm sorry one of you needs a doctor and one of you is in jail.
I could have prevented it, but I didn't.
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Post by lordherefordsknob on Mar 2, 2024 21:48:37 GMT
Epic thread incoming.
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Post by stiggerstackle on Mar 2, 2024 22:00:57 GMT
I remember clearing the bar at the Victoria Hall a few years ago during the intermission. Women were literally gagging and many a bloke were being bollocked. My sister just whispered ‘dirty bastard’ to me.
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Post by telfordstokie on Mar 2, 2024 22:02:17 GMT
This story smells a bit funny to me.
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Post by Paul Spencer on Mar 2, 2024 23:00:47 GMT
Did anyone see this? Two blokes were wildly swinging at each other and one of them got absolutely haymakered in the gob. One of them was accusing the other of farting horrifically and repetitively. Anyway, it was me, I didn't say anything at the time because I was scared and it was funny, but sorry lads, I was the phantom farter of Block 28, I'm sorry one of you needs a doctor and one of you is in jail. I could have prevented it, but I didn't.
You really are full of shit ...
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Post by RF10 on Mar 2, 2024 23:02:08 GMT
What row? I'm in block 28 and saw no signs of commotion.
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Post by cvillestokie on Mar 2, 2024 23:02:23 GMT
Did anyone see this? Two blokes were wildly swinging at each other and one of them got absolutely haymakered in the gob. One of them was accusing the other of farting horrifically and repetitively. Anyway, it was me, I didn't say anything at the time because I was scared and it was funny, but sorry lads, I was the phantom farter of Block 28, I'm sorry one of you needs a doctor and one of you is in jail. I could have prevented it, but I didn't.
You really are full of shit ...
A little bit less so after the game it seems 😂 |
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Post by borat on Mar 2, 2024 23:05:38 GMT
Shit bin
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Post by jesusmcmuffin on Mar 2, 2024 23:10:25 GMT
An ex GF got us tickets to see the local Premiere of Independence Day thinking my kind of film years ago .
About a minute before it started a bloke about 25 stone sat in the empty seat in front of me and let off farts that would have made the aliens head home on their own and blocked any view I had of the screen .
The only thing worse than Fartzilla in front of me was the film itself.
I feel their pain
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Post by spiderpuss on Mar 2, 2024 23:48:58 GMT
You lot have got to stop making me laugh uncontrollably in a pub.
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Post by Scouse on Mar 3, 2024 0:43:11 GMT
The fart was the straw that broke the camels back , but the trouble started when one of them was accused of having a drum hidden under his coat , when one lad spotted what appeared to be drumsticks sticking out of the other ones arse pocket …
Stories of them being chop sticks and that he was on the way to a celebratory Chinese meal after the game with his Mrs wasn’t believed
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Post by greystokie on Mar 3, 2024 0:57:47 GMT
I saw Farting Horrifically support World of Twist in the 90's. They stunk the place out.
(With acknowledgements to Mr. Clams)
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Post by lawrieleslie on Mar 3, 2024 7:24:25 GMT
Anybody ever had a course of chemotherapy and presented 6 months of chemo farts? Absolute Chemical warfare stuff.
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Post by middleoftheboothen on Mar 3, 2024 7:30:06 GMT
Anybody ever had a course of chemotherapy and presented 6 months of chemo farts? Absolute Chemical warfare stuff. Not exactly mate but the denosumab injections I was on made my farts really bad. Watching my lady check young uns nappy every ten minutes for the best part of a year was a great source of entertainment for me I must say. |
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Post by lawrieleslie on Mar 3, 2024 7:45:01 GMT
Anybody ever had a course of chemotherapy and presented 6 months of chemo farts? Absolute Chemical warfare stuff. Not exactly mate but the denosumab injections I was on made my farts really bad. Watching my lady check young uns nappy every ten minutes for the best part of a year was a great source of entertainment for me I must say. Has the denosumab helped mate? I believe it’s a fairly harsh treatment with many side effects. |
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Post by middleoftheboothen on Mar 3, 2024 7:51:02 GMT
Not exactly mate but the denosumab injections I was on made my farts really bad. Watching my lady check young uns nappy every ten minutes for the best part of a year was a great source of entertainment for me I must say. Has the denosumab helped mate? I believe it’s a fairly harsh treatment with many side effects. It did stop the tumor growing mate but I still had to have a lot of the bone in my leg removed. Stopped me loosing my leg really though so really yes it did the job. Side effects are rough though mate yes but it really was my only option at the time. |
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Post by GreaterGlasgowstokie on Mar 3, 2024 13:02:24 GMT
I saw it. It escalated very quickly. Were you the lad behind them eating his chicken balti pie and downing it with a bovril? No wonder. Should be ashamed of yourself
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Post by jesusmcmuffin on Mar 3, 2024 13:05:32 GMT
Has the denosumab helped mate? I believe it’s a fairly harsh treatment with many side effects. It did stop the tumor growing mate but I still had to have a lot of the bone in my leg removed. Stopped me loosing my leg really though so really yes it did the job. Side effects are rough though mate yes but it really was my only option at the time. My Granddad had similar Not nice but keep going 👍 |
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Post by PotterLog on Mar 3, 2024 13:34:33 GMT
18 posts and two sub-threads - one about horrendous farts that clear the room, one critiquing the benefits and drawbacks of different cancer treatments. Got to love the Oatie
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Post by nott1 on Mar 3, 2024 13:56:14 GMT
There's nothing like a good fart except for a good shit I reckon!
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Post by middleoftheboothen on Mar 3, 2024 14:05:13 GMT
It did stop the tumor growing mate but I still had to have a lot of the bone in my leg removed. Stopped me loosing my leg really though so really yes it did the job. Side effects are rough though mate yes but it really was my only option at the time. My Granddad had similar Not nice but keep going 👍 Legs mostly metal now mate so am over worst of it but thanks 👍 Like the bionic man now 😂 |
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Post by jesusmcmuffin on Mar 3, 2024 14:15:25 GMT
My Granddad had similar Not nice but keep going 👍 Legs mostly metal now mate so am over worst of it but thanks 👍 Like the bionic man now 😂 👍 |
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Post by jesusmcmuffin on Mar 3, 2024 14:17:14 GMT
18 posts and two sub-threads - one about horrendous farts that clear the room, one critiquing the benefits and drawbacks of different cancer treatments. Got to love the Oatie You've probably acclimatised with the locals there eating 8 bean chilli for breakfast |
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Post by J-Roar on Mar 3, 2024 14:19:07 GMT
There's nothing like a good fart except for a good shit I reckon! A slash when you're desperate pisses all over a good shit. |
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Post by Mr_DaftBurger on Mar 3, 2024 14:20:41 GMT
Unless it made a dog sick.... you have to do better!
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Post by middleoftheboothen on Mar 3, 2024 14:23:04 GMT
There's nothing like a good fart except for a good shit I reckon! A slash when you're desperate pisses all over a good shit. I agree mate but the consequences of not making the toilet for the shit are far more catastrophic. |
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Post by PotterLog on Mar 3, 2024 14:27:46 GMT
There's nothing like a good fart except for a good shit I reckon! A slash when you're desperate pisses all over a good shit. Quite literally in many cases |
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Post by skemstokie on Mar 3, 2024 15:00:19 GMT
Anybody ever had a course of chemotherapy and presented 6 months of chemo farts? Absolute Chemical warfare stuff. I have just had chemo,no change on the farting front though. |
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Post by questionable on Mar 4, 2024 8:31:53 GMT
Recall my father in law letting one go in the Stafford Arms, Bagnalll helped by a wooden seat the acoustics were unreal. The whole pub went quiet and I got daggers all night as they thought it was me.
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Post by elystokie on Mar 4, 2024 8:54:20 GMT
Recall my father in law letting one go in the Stafford Arms, Bagnalll helped by a wooden seat the acoustics were unreal. The whole pub went quiet and I got daggers all night as they thought it was me. My ex-missus confessed years after the event, that the incredibly potent smell that cleared the kitchen in seconds at a party in Fareham, wasn't actually my beer monster mate that got the majority of the blame at the time, it was her 😄 |
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