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Post by Arthurdollar on Apr 29, 2008 16:27:26 GMT
As it is one of my favourite pastimes i wonder if you would like to share some of your best or most embaressing farting stories.
Let the discussion commence. ;D
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Post by Done It For Fcuk4stoke on Apr 29, 2008 16:38:59 GMT
lol my worst was in a very busy McDonalds, every 1 looked so i looked at my m8 indiscust and blamed him for it  |
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Post by boothenendboy on Apr 29, 2008 16:48:35 GMT
whenever the cats lying on the chair i always lean over and fart in its face.it hates me.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2008 17:01:07 GMT
getting out of my seat in the dining room full of guests in a nice Hotel in Torquay, a stretch caused a rather large blast, left promptly without looking back
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Post by Arthurdollar on Apr 29, 2008 17:08:19 GMT
I remember i was in a crowded bus stop one rainy night in ´Castle and eased out the most potent of bring tears to your eyes trumps it was vile, i promptly pointed at my mate and made my exit with every fucker else. We did´nt need a bus ....He chased me all the fuckin way home ;D
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Post by Staffsoatcake on Apr 29, 2008 17:14:40 GMT
I let one rip only the other week in the pub.thank God for elasticated pants I say.  |
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Post by Birchesheadpotter on Apr 29, 2008 17:18:05 GMT
whenever the cats lying on the chair i always lean over and fart in its face.it hates me. ;D ;D ;D Funniest thing Iv heard on here in a while that, have some karma Well, in about 20 mins when I can get it to you  |
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Post by boothenendboy on Apr 29, 2008 17:19:03 GMT
my best fart was when i ran up the stairs and did a fart for every step i stepped on.i have been trying to do this again for several years but i can't do it.
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Post by Arthurdollar on Apr 29, 2008 17:22:04 GMT
Q. Have farts got lumps in ? ??? If not i´ve just shit me sen  |
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Post by Pretty Little Boother on Apr 29, 2008 17:26:54 GMT
I once did a really potently rancid, rotting-meat smelling fart in Zenn nightclub up Hanley... If anyone's been in there you'll know the place is never ever full, there were about thirty people in there at that time. I swiftly went outiside to the smoking area and watched in delight as people cleared to the bathroom to be sick. ;D
Well, that's what you get for wanting a smoking ban!
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Post by Arthurdollar on Apr 29, 2008 17:29:33 GMT
I once did a really potently rancid, rotting-meat smelling fart in Zenn nightclub up Hanley... If anyone's been in there you'll know the place is never ever full, there were about thirty people in there at that time. I swiftly went outiside to the smoking area and watched in delight as people cleared to the bathroom to be sick. ;D Well, that's what you get for wanting a smoking ban! ;D |
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Post by mozzer68 on Apr 29, 2008 17:58:56 GMT
I was walking home from work a few months back when a distressed woman stopped me, her father had fallen and was lying on the floor, she explained that he had collapsed and banged his head when he fell, i crouched down to check for any injury and let out a massive fart right in front of him.
i tried really hard for the next few minutes to keep a straight face in what was really a serious situation, i don't know if the woman took any notice but i could feel my face burning with embaressment
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Post by Arthurdollar on Apr 29, 2008 18:05:25 GMT
I was walking home from work a few months back when a distressed woman stopped me, her father had fallen and was lying on the floor, she explained that he had collapsed and banged his head when he fell, i crouched down to check for any injury and let out a massive fart right in front of him. i tried really hard for the next few minutes to keep a straight face in what was really a serious situation, i don't know if the woman took any notice but i could feel my face burning with embaressment Did he survive......the fart i mean ??? |
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Post by mozzer68 on Apr 29, 2008 18:11:28 GMT
Lol, thought it best to phone for an ambulance, covers all bases, you get medical experts and oxygen!
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Post by trend....... on Apr 29, 2008 18:52:53 GMT
When i was 8/9 ... at primary school, we were doing P.E and all sitting on the gym floor. I did a fucking beauty fart and the whole class laughed, got a bit of a telling off from the teacher like... then about 5 minutes later, i did another and the teacher was getting a bit pissed off by now. Few minutes later i should could not hold them in and after about the 5th one in succsession, a fucking wave on brown shit came flooding down my shorts and all over the gym floor, i then sat there crying, sitting in my shit. The next day, in assembly, there was a huge gap where no one would sit as they knew about my happenings. Looking back, im ever so proud.
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Post by stokiematt on Apr 29, 2008 19:00:50 GMT
thats fucking disgusting paul williams ;D ;D
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Post by Butters on Apr 29, 2008 19:40:52 GMT
When i was 8/9 ... at primary school, we were doing P.E and all sitting on the gym floor. I did a fucking beauty fart and the whole class laughed, got a bit of a telling off from the teacher like... then about 5 minutes later, i did another and the teacher was getting a bit pissed off by now. Few minutes later i should could not hold them in and after about the 5th one in succsession, a fucking wave on brown shit came flooding down my shorts and all over the gym floor, i then sat there crying, sitting in my shit. The next day, in assembly, there was a huge gap where no one would sit as they knew about my happenings. Looking back, im ever so proud. ;D ;D |
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Post by LH_SCFC on Apr 29, 2008 21:23:56 GMT
The best post I have ever read was on the Rivals Oatcake, concerning a fart that made someone's dog sick.
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Post by SuperRickyFuller on Apr 29, 2008 21:26:20 GMT
;D I remember that post LH. It was quite possibly one of the best posts ever made in Oatcake history |
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Post by Arthurdollar on Apr 29, 2008 21:30:18 GMT
In fact with my fetish on this subject i remember starting it, and that poster talking about his dog made me piss myself ;D
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Post by LH_SCFC on Apr 29, 2008 21:35:42 GMT
In fact with my fetish on this subject i remember starting it, and that poster talking about his dog made me piss myself ;D Farting, shitting yourself and now pissing yourself. No end to your talents arthur! |
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Post by SuperRickyFuller on Apr 29, 2008 21:36:40 GMT
Tried doing all three at the same time Arthur? ;D |
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Post by myleftboot on Apr 30, 2008 0:15:19 GMT
Not me personally but I was in Cornwalls chemist in Castle on Monday and theres this really well spoken old woman at the counter asking about some kind of pills or other. The woman behind the counter goes off and looks to see if they have them in and while she is gone this owd un fills her tights, the bass on it was shocking, rattled the front door.
This old dear never raised an eye lid but I had to go outside and piss myself laughing.
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Post by Arthurdollar on Apr 30, 2008 6:52:45 GMT
Tried doing all three at the same time Arthur? ;D I hanna thought about that ???, maybe it could be called a dementia hatrick ;D |
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Post by dadofsam on Apr 30, 2008 7:57:48 GMT
One of the few funny Tate characters is that prim woman who complains about things then proceeds to let rip very noisily.
For me it was with this girl I'd been chasing for ages and finally my ship had come in - each of my final few vinegar thrusts was accompanied by a trumpet voluntary of bottom wind followed by a satisfied post coital low rumbler
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Post by Arthurdollar on Apr 30, 2008 8:10:20 GMT
One of the few funny Tate characters is that prim woman who complains about things then proceeds to let rip very noisily. For me it was with this girl I'd been chasing for ages and finally my ship had come in - each of my final few vinegar thrusts was accompanied by a trumpet voluntary of bottom wind followed by a satisfied post coital low rumbler Brought tears to my eye´s that one..............Pure Shakespeare  |
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Post by brownscfc on Apr 30, 2008 11:37:42 GMT
Sitting in the canteen at school, brewed up a reet big fart. The seat that i was sitting on at the time made it even louder, rippled from underneath my arse, was amazing, everyone turned around n i felt so proud. Can never get my arse to shut up sometimes though  |
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Post by 606Stokie on Apr 30, 2008 11:43:57 GMT
Best one was in Manchester city centre when was going to stay at the Gf for the 1st time... I reeked one on the tram and it follwed us all the way home... She wasent happy...
Then i did one as i met her mom for the first time and in a indian resturant Very loud as i was ording a pint just here this Bang...
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Post by bettyswallocks on Apr 30, 2008 11:49:39 GMT
LH- I think me dog is still to this day ill from the effects of that night. The bloody look in the fuckers eye when the indian arrives is brilliant, the little rant fucks off in t'other room |
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Post by Pretty Little Boother on Apr 30, 2008 17:26:56 GMT
Fucking Oatcake gold, I'm here with tears in my eyes I'm laughing so hard.. Especially at Mozzer's post, had me pissing my sides! And remembering that dog post off the old site! ;D ;D ;D
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