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Post by ersaurebot 1, 000, 000 views on Jun 10, 2011 6:44:29 GMT
i have been asked by someone at church (as im the only proper foorball fan of the church) to come up with some religious football chants for a youth type service on sunday. Its only a bit of a laugh really.
THe roblem is though that if i dont they will come up with something like 'your going home with the love of Jesus' and thats just a bit wrong aint it.
So i want to do some but they need a bit of an edge, i realise asking the GDP for something woth a 'bit of an edge' is like asking Harold Shipman if he's got something with a bit of akick to it for me great grandmother.
but even though you will probably come up with a load of wholly inappropriate ones, it might be a bit of a larf out of season.
i will start with a few to get the ball rolling:
Yaweehhhhhh Yaweh will tear you apart again x2
(ryan shawx theme) de de de de Father Abraham x2
he'll smite who he wants, he'll smite who he waaaants, the almighty, he'll smite who he wants
xx
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Post by Yorkshirepotter on Jun 10, 2011 7:21:16 GMT
My synagogue Is bigger than this, My synagogue is bigger than this, Its got a bimah and a Torah, My synagogue is bigger than this!
Your gonna get youre messiah crusified.
You can shove your evolution up your arse.......
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Post by kidsgrove4 on Jun 10, 2011 7:37:59 GMT
Jesus Chriiiist walks on water.................
Bread, bread, who will buy my bread I've made enough to feed you cunts, now who will buy my bread...........
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Post by Trouserdog on Jun 10, 2011 7:45:29 GMT
Riiiichard Dawkins, you're a wanker, you're a wanker...
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Post by PixiePotter on Jun 10, 2011 8:01:11 GMT
i have been asked by someone at church (as im the only proper foorball fan of the church) to come up with some religious football chants for a youth type service on sunday. Its only a bit of a laugh really. THe roblem is though that if i dont they will come up with something like 'your going home with the love of Jesus' and thats just a bit wrong aint it. So i want to do some but they need a bit of an edge, i realise asking the GDP for something woth a 'bit of an edge' is like asking Harold Shipman if he's got something with a bit of akick to it for me great grandmother. but even though you will probably come up with a load of wholly inappropriate ones, it might be a bit of a larf out of season. i will start with a few to get the ball rolling: Yaweehhhhhh Yaweh will tear you apart again x2 (ryan Shawcross theme) de de de de Father Abraham x2 he'll smite who he wants, he'll smite who he waaaants, the almighty, he'll smite who he wants xx He'll smite who he wants? Are you sure the church will be happy with that one? ;D
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Post by Yorkshirepotter on Jun 10, 2011 8:01:34 GMT
There's only one Pope Benedict, Only on Pope Benedict, With a packet of sweets, And a cheeky smile..... ....maybe not then ![;)](//storage.proboards.com/800541/images/0m0lbCuTEBzaRn6f8QaM.gif)
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Post by Will_75 on Jun 10, 2011 8:05:23 GMT
There's only one Pope Benedict, Only on Pope Benedict, With a packet of sweets, And a cheeky smile..... ....maybe not then ![;)](//storage.proboards.com/800541/images/0m0lbCuTEBzaRn6f8QaM.gif) ;D
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Post by Will_75 on Jun 10, 2011 8:14:45 GMT
Jeeeesus *clap clap clap* Jeeeeesus *clap clap clap* He's the boy in shining white Everything will be alright He's the guide of all of us today... He'll be with you, be with you, be with you Every step along the way etc me, this morning: ![](http://www.wearysloth.com/Gallery/ActorsB/30877.gif)
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Post by Mr_DaftBurger on Jun 10, 2011 8:20:23 GMT
There is a green hill far away without a city wall Where our dear lord was crucified he died to save us all
2 3 4 for he's a jolly good fellow.............
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Post by Will_75 on Jun 10, 2011 8:22:38 GMT
did you see that? did you see that? doubting thomas, did you see that?
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2011 8:25:01 GMT
When I was just a little boy, I asked my vicar what should i be, Should I be bent or should I be straight, Heres what he said to me, open your mouth up son, And suck my massive gun, And blow me til I come, And blow me til I come, I love boys, I love boys...
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Post by Will_75 on Jun 10, 2011 8:29:11 GMT
he came here from bethlehem, jesus, jesus he came to cleanse the sins of men, jesus, jesus
he's got holes in his hands and feet we all think he's pretty neat
jesus christ, he will be back again
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Post by foster on Jun 10, 2011 8:36:58 GMT
Whoaaa! …. Whoaaa! Everybody In The World Likes Jesus Oooh, We Love him! Oh, He Makes You Happy Yeah, He Gets You Sexy He Makes You Fat But We Don't Care About That... Come On!
One, two, One, two, three.
Mama She Says Roly Poly, Papa He Says Holy Moly Everybody Wants A Jesus Latte (Messiah - iah) All The Boys Want Candy Candy, All The Girls Get Randy Randy Everybody Wants A Jesus Laaatte
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Post by robdog on Jun 10, 2011 8:46:12 GMT
He's bald He's bent His arse is up for rent Laz-a-rus, Laz-a-rus
He's fat He's round He bounces on the ground Bu-dd-ah, Bu-dd-ah
Oh (insert name of church) is wonderful Oh (insert name of church) is won-der-ful Its full of small boys being touched up Oh (insert name of church) is wonderful
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2011 8:51:07 GMT
When I was just a little boy, I asked my vicar what should i be, Should I be jewish, should I be gay, Heres what he said to me, wash your mouth out son, And fetch your father's gun, And THROW THE JEW DOWN THE WELL! SO MY COUNTRY CAN BE FREE!
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Post by foster on Jun 10, 2011 8:56:03 GMT
You pull your foreskin in, Your foreskin out, In out, in out, And shake it all about, you put it on a woodblock and you chop it off, that's what being a jews about, HEY!!
Doooooo, the jewbie woobie, Doooooo the jewbie woobie, Doooooo the joobie woobie, that's what being a jews about.
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Post by winedelilah on Jun 10, 2011 9:15:27 GMT
Some quality chants here Ersaurebot... ;D more than enough to keep the congregation happy I would have thought.. ;D
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Post by ersaurebot 1, 000, 000 views on Jun 10, 2011 11:32:06 GMT
It's gonna be a great day!
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boogaloo
Youth Player
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star.png) ![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star.png)
. . . trace evidence. Hair. Fibres. Pussy.
Posts: 414
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Post by boogaloo on Jun 10, 2011 11:49:59 GMT
Moses, he takes it up the arse, he takes it up the arse.
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Post by DansViews on Jun 10, 2011 11:51:32 GMT
Away in a manger No crib for a bed the little lord jesus stood up and he said WE HATE VALE WE HATE VALE
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Post by st2potter on Jun 10, 2011 13:08:10 GMT
Got one for ya about buying a flute for fifty pence, might not go down well mind
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Post by Tubes on Jun 10, 2011 13:56:41 GMT
to the tune of Your Grounds Too Big For You It's just a fairytale It's just a fairytale etc. ![;)](//storage.proboards.com/800541/images/0m0lbCuTEBzaRn6f8QaM.gif)
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Post by Will_75 on Jun 10, 2011 14:07:18 GMT
who's that nailed to the crucifix? who's that nailed to the cross? it's jesus and the thieves and they're all dead and gone but one of them's coming back
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Post by n01stokie on Jun 10, 2011 14:12:28 GMT
;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by scfcmacca on Jun 10, 2011 15:04:42 GMT
abdoylaye my lord......
jesus, jesus running down the chruch jesus, jesus running down the church loved by cunts, fucked by his dad jesus,jesus,jesus
your going get your back doors smashed in clap clap clap
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Post by Carlos Dickabout on Jun 10, 2011 17:40:53 GMT
YOU'RE NOT SINNING! YOU'RE NOT SINNING! YOU'RE NOT SINNING ANYMOOORREEE! YOU'RE NOT SINNING ANYMORE!
OH NOAH'S ARC.. IS FULL OF SHIT! OH NOAH'S ARC IS FULL OF SHIT! IT'S GOT TWO SLOTHS...TWO OTTERS AND TWO GEESE.. OH NOAH'S ARC IS FULL OF SHIT!
JESUS CHRIST, JESUS CHRIST, RUNNING ON THE SEA! JESUS CHRIST, JESUS CHRIST, RUNNING ON THE SEA! FEARED BY THE ROMANS.. LOVED BY DECIPLES! JESUS CHRIIIIISST...JESUS CHRIIIISST...JESUS CHRIIST!
CAN YOU HEAR THE HINDU'S SING? NO-OHH! NO-OHH! CAN YOU HEAR THE YIDDISH SING? NO-OHH! NO-OHH! CAN YOU HEAR ISLAMICS SING? I CAN'T HEAR A FUCKING THING NO-OHH! OH-OHH! SHHHH! AHHHHHH!!
WHEN...WILL WE...WILL WE SEE JEEESSSUUUSSS?? I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT! I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT!
JEWS, JEWS WHEREVER YOU MAY BE WE'RE EATING HAM ON THE SEA OF GALLILEE! IT COULD BE WORSE, WE COULD BE YOU, EATING SPAGETTI WITHOUT RAGU!
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Post by neoisd1 on Jun 10, 2011 17:47:50 GMT
He fucks his own hands He fucks his own haaaaaaaaaands Jesus Christ, he fucks his own hands.
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Post by Orbs on Jun 10, 2011 17:59:04 GMT
Said we love easter eggs said we love easter eggs
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Post by DansViews on Jun 10, 2011 19:04:26 GMT
theres only one lord jesus one lord jesus with a packet of sweets and a cheeky smile jesus is a fucking paedophile
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Post by Carlos Dickabout on Jun 10, 2011 19:52:29 GMT
5000 MEN WENT TO GET FED FED! FED ON FISH AND TWO BREAD 5000 MEN 4999 MEN 4998 MEN 4997 MEN 4996 MEN ... 3 MEN 2 MEN 1 MAN AND HIS DOG FED ON FISH AND TWO BREAD!!
HELL IS A SHIT HOLE! I'D RATHER GO PURGATORY!
THE BUSH! THE BUSH! THE BUSH IS ON FIRE! MOSES AIN'T NO JESUS, LET THE MOTHER FUCKER BURN! BURN MOTHER FUCKER! BURN!
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