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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2008 14:00:20 GMT
A friend of mine, well he’s more of an acquaintance (you may know him – vestan pance his username is) has taken to inserting objects into his anus.
He started off small with things such as chocolate fingers but has gradually moved up and he’s now on cucumbers.
He now has an anal seepage problem (he leaves anal juice rings wherever he sits – it’s not pretty) and he is too embarrassed to see a doctor.
My question is, other than a cork, are there any other solutions?
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Post by tazi on Jul 1, 2008 14:04:54 GMT
A friend of mine, well he’s more of an acquaintance (you may know him – vestan pance his username is) has taken to inserting objects into his anus. He started off small with things such as chocolate fingers but has gradually moved up and he’s now on cucumbers. He now has an anal seepage problem (he leaves anal juice rings wherever he sits – it’s not pretty) and he is too embarrassed to see a doctor. My question is, other than a cork, are there any other solutions? Due to it's potential loss of flexibility do not under any circumstances peel the cucumber.
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Post by SegaMegaDave on Jul 1, 2008 14:06:57 GMT
a scotch egg would probably do the job
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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2008 14:09:07 GMT
Could vestan be the first person ever to undergo an anus transplant?
I think he should get Ealmon Holmes’ anus.
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Post by vestanpance on Jul 1, 2008 14:11:07 GMT
Or alternatively, i could just swap it for your mouth?
Both seem to excrete faecal matter, and both have been used as sexual orifices for financial gain.
It's a win-win, your* a bit of a slack-jaw macgraw anyway.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2008 14:13:25 GMT
If you do find a “fix” to your problem Vestan, will you let your Mum know.
I’m sick and tired of her leaving her anal juices all over my house.
Dirty bitch.
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Post by vestanpance on Jul 1, 2008 14:14:42 GMT
She's not as bad as your mum.
They've started calling your mum "the snail" in my road. I've taken to meeting with her at the local travelodge
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Post by chunkie on Jul 1, 2008 14:37:29 GMT
try the andrex puppy?
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