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Post by pretzel on Jun 25, 2008 12:23:57 GMT
Husband and wife are shopping in Tesco's when the man picks up a crate of Stella and sticks them into the trolley
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife 'They're on offer, only £10 for 24 cans', he says
'Put them back. We can't afford it,' says the wife and they carry on shopping...
A few aisles later the woman picks up a £20 jar of face cream and sticks it into the trolley.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the man, 'It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' she says.
The man replies... 'SO DOES 24 CANS OF STELLA AND IT'S HALF THE FUCKING PRICE'
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Post by scfcmatt on Jun 25, 2008 12:24:55 GMT
;D like it
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Post by GRUMPY 1 on Jun 25, 2008 18:35:00 GMT
The train was quite crowded, so a U.S. Marine walked the entire length looking for a seat, but the only seat left was taken by a well dressed, middle-aged, English woman's poodle.
The war-weary Marine asked, 'Ma'am, may I have that seat ?'
The woman just sniffed and said to no one in particular,
'Americans are so rude. My little Fifi is using that seat.'
The Marine walked the entire train again, but the only seat left was under that dog.
Please, ma'am. May I sit down? I'm very tired.'
She snorted, 'Not only are you Americans rude, you are also arrogant!'
This time the Marine didn't say a word; he just picked up the little dog, tossed it out the train window, and sat down.
The woman shrieked, 'Someone must defend my honour!!! And put this American in his place!!!'
An English gentleman sitting nearby lowered his newspaper and said...
'Sir, you Americans seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing...
You hold the fork in the wrong hand.
You drive your autos on the wrong side of the road.
And now, sir,
you seem to have thrown the wrong bitch out the window
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Post by Miniman on Jun 25, 2008 19:16:36 GMT
Love em both!!!!
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Post by daverichards on Jun 25, 2008 19:22:45 GMT
was that from Zoo or Nuts pretzel, read it this week
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Post by powchirper on Jun 25, 2008 20:40:42 GMT
Both worthy of two ;D ;D
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