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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 8:55:29 GMT
So I'm now a young 49yr old......went to hospital to have a kidney stone removed that was blocking my kidney exit in all their wisdom they decided to go up my jap, through my prostate, through my bladder and rayt up to my kidney with what can only be described as a bike inner tube (Stent) obviously, I had to have a temp catheter to shift all the blood etc so I could piss again.....it worked.....it fucking wrecked too (talk about curled up toes) It was "temporary" so later they could go up with a lazer, camera ....kitchen sink etc and destroy said stone So nearly 12 months later no news on operation, I'm working away boarding a ceiling and I get kidney pains and a constant urge to piss.......only the piss turns out to be blood. back I go to urology who sheepishly smile and say, "oops, shouldn't have been in this long, we must have lost you......your body is rejecting the stent (rofl)Oh how we laughed Emergency op then....I'm finally getting this bolder and inner tube taken out after op they sent me home very next day I couldn't piss....but I was bosting.....off to A&E......eventually after dying for a piss for about 4 hours they found a nurse that could cathertise me........toe curler Skip forward...Tell me me that my prostate has enlarged ......I asked because of op?.......oh no mr frase..... There must have been some underlining problem before.....yeh right, you fucking butchers. go home with catheter on tap and a bag for night time then we'll have to lazer your prostate ....at a later date i said..." Woah, hold on there krippen" can an we see after I've healed a bit if I can piss on my own first krippin ... "Ok we owe you that I suppose come back in 10 weeks.....10 weeks with a tube and tap as a penis Krippen...."nurse will explain how you have sex wearing a catheter" Dunner wriggle too much duck you might turn me tap on. anyway...after 10 weeks I could piss...albeit only half flow so now I go for water flow tests every six month because they Conner wait to operate all fine so far but, he always insists on putting his finger up my bum on these days.....while gently inserting a finger, he slowly leans over my shoulder a whispers in my neck...."mmmm....your prostate is fantastic" (((shivers))) we we have a fag and a coffee after and say our goodbyes until 6months time God bless the NHS eh......not thank you for reading to be continued......if I'm still here
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Post by salopstick on Dec 19, 2014 9:36:58 GMT
That's made my day
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Post by lastoftheldk on Dec 19, 2014 10:07:00 GMT
, not nice, and a lot of incompetence
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 10:11:49 GMT
Sounds terrible that. Wish you well in the future! Hope all turns out well in the end.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 10:12:44 GMT
, not nice, and a lot of incompetence Incontinence you mean Well, I think so mate.....but they don't .....and I'm to soft to cause trouble see salop I'm a very nice man
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Post by OldStokie on Dec 19, 2014 11:07:21 GMT
, not nice, and a lot of incompetence Incontinence you mean Well, I think so mate.....but they don't .....and I'm to soft to cause trouble see salop I'm a very nice man Just you wait 'till you get to the retrograde ejaculation stage. OS.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 11:53:08 GMT
Incontinence you mean Well, I think so mate.....but they don't .....and I'm to soft to cause trouble see salop I'm a very nice man Just you wait 'till you get to the retrograde ejaculation stage. OS. Got the t shirt
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Post by localloser on Dec 19, 2014 12:20:07 GMT
Fooking weird int eet?
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Post by wizzardofdribble on Dec 19, 2014 12:27:34 GMT
So I'm now a young 49yr old......went to hospital to have a kidney stone removed that was blocking my kidney exit in all their wisdom they decided to go up my jap, through my prostate, through my bladder and rayt up to my kidney with what can only be described as a bike inner tube (Stent) obviously, I had to have a temp catheter to shift all the blood etc so I could piss again.....it worked.....it fucking wrecked too (talk about curled up toes) It was "temporary" so later they could go up with a lazer, camera ....kitchen sink etc and destroy said stone So nearly 12 months later no news on operation, I'm working away boarding a ceiling and I get kidney pains and a constant urge to piss.......only the piss turns out to be blood. back I go to urology who sheepishly smile and say, "oops, shouldn't have been in this long, we must have lost you......your body is rejecting the stent (rofl)Oh how we laughed Emergency op then....I'm finally getting this bolder and inner tube taken out after op they sent me home very next day I couldn't piss....but I was bosting.....off to A&E......eventually after dying for a piss for about 4 hours they found a nurse that could cathertise me........toe curler Skip forward...Tell me me that my prostate has enlarged ......I asked because of op?.......oh no mr frase..... There must have been some underlining problem before.....yeh right, you fucking butchers. go home with catheter on tap and a bag for night time then we'll have to lazer your prostate ....at a later date i said..." Woah, hold on there krippen" can an we see after I've healed a bit if I can piss on my own first krippin ... "Ok we owe you that I suppose come back in 10 weeks.....10 weeks with a tube and tap as a penis Krippen...."nurse will explain how you have sex wearing a catheter" Dunner wriggle too much duck you might turn me tap on. anyway...after 10 weeks I could piss...albeit only half flow so now I go for water flow tests every six month because they Conner wait to operate all fine so far but, he always insists on putting his finger up my bum on these days.....while gently inserting a finger, he slowly leans over my shoulder a whispers in my neck...."mmmm....your prostate is fantastic" (((shivers))) we we have a fag and a coffee after and say our goodbyes until 6months time God bless the NHS eh......not thank you for reading to be continued......if I'm still here That's given me the best hard-on I've had for ages
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Post by redstriper on Dec 19, 2014 12:31:09 GMT
By the grace of god... I almost feel your pain!
my father in law has just gone through similar - he's recovered, and he is 83, so there's plenty of chance you'll get it all sorted.
nb) he does have private medical though...
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 12:55:56 GMT
By the grace of god... I almost feel your pain! my father in law has just gone through similar - he's recovered, and he is 83, so there's plenty of chance you'll get it all sorted. nb) he does have private medical though... I'm glad your father inlaw is sorted mate but me being 49 means it won't be sorted as such i, don't want to cut away at my prostate at that age as it continually enlarges so I'll have no prostate left by the time I'm retirement age......I'll be sitting in the pub wringing fucking wet every five minutes this all happened a couple of year ago.....I keep going to check my flow incase it's getting worse.... krippen keeps asking if I want to have it done.....even tho he knows I shouldn't yet as I only take slightly longer than the normal stokie to empty my bladder....well twice the time if I'm honest They em think im a camel in the boothen toilets i went in to have a kidney stone removed......came out with prostatitis
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Post by tuum on Dec 19, 2014 13:15:28 GMT
By the grace of god... I almost feel your pain! my father in law has just gone through similar - he's recovered, and he is 83, so there's plenty of chance you'll get it all sorted. nb) he does have private medical though... I'm glad your father inlaw is sorted mate but me being 49 means it won't be sorted as such i, don't want to cut away at my prostate at that age as it continually enlarges so I'll have no prostate left by the time I'm retirement age......I'll be sitting in the pub wringing fucking wet every five minutes this all happened a couple of year ago.....I keep going to check my flow incase it's getting worse.... krippen keeps asking if I want to have it done.....even tho he knows I shouldn't yet as I only take slightly longer than the normal stokie to empty my bladder....well twice the time if I'm honest They em think im a camel in the boothen toilets i went in to have a kidney stone removed......came out with prostatitis I was going to say I feel your pain but that is patently bollox so instead I will say that you have my sympathy. It's good you can maintain a positive attitude. I am no fan of the NHS and would always pay to seek a second opinion overseas if possible. I just cannot bring myself to trust them.
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Post by localloser on Dec 19, 2014 13:16:58 GMT
You have my sympathy buddy. Have you tried Tamulosin? It relaxes the muscle around the prostate and reduces the urgency. But you do get erectile difficulties and the retrograde ejaculation as mentioned earlier. You can't fooking win I find. Take care pal.
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Post by wizzardofdribble on Dec 19, 2014 13:26:10 GMT
You have my sympathy buddy. Have you tried Tamulosin? It relaxes the muscle around the prostate and reduces the urgency. But you do get erectile difficulties and the retrograde ejaculation as mentioned earlier. You can't fooking win I find. Take care pal. What does she look like? These East European Birds are a real turn on
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Post by localloser on Dec 19, 2014 13:30:53 GMT
You have my sympathy buddy. Have you tried Tamulosin? It relaxes the muscle around the prostate and reduces the urgency. But you do get erectile difficulties and the retrograde ejaculation as mentioned earlier. You can't fooking win I find. Take care pal. What does she look like? These East European Birds are a real turn on Didn't you read the bit about erectile difficulties?
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Post by OldStokie on Dec 19, 2014 13:56:14 GMT
When I was a young man I was a six inches and a wrinkle and could piss over a six foot wall, but now I'm old and knackered, I'm six wrinkles and an inch and can't piss on a wall just six inches away from me. Tamulosin is good. It's saved me a fortune on nappies. OS.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 14:43:59 GMT
You have my sympathy buddy. Have you tried Tamulosin? It relaxes the muscle around the prostate and reduces the urgency. But you do get erectile difficulties and the retrograde ejaculation as mentioned earlier. You can't fooking win I find. Take care pal. Yes to all them mate I'm about to go in now...I'm light hearted about it all until I hear their constant excuses
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 14:45:40 GMT
When I was a young man I was a six inches and a wrinkle and could piss over a six foot wall, but now I'm old and knackered, I'm six wrinkles and an inch and can't piss on a wall just six inches away from me. Tamulosin is good. It's saved me a fortune on nappies. OS.
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Post by santy on Dec 19, 2014 15:01:08 GMT
It must be a common problem for stokies though based on the amount of time you're waiting for them to finish pissing. I think it would seriously bother me if I had to spend that amount of time just waiting. Although I am 26 now, about what age do you lose the ability to have a piss in a timely fashion?
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Post by 2004 on Dec 19, 2014 15:13:57 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 15:19:42 GMT
Not to worry you santy, but when I've been and think I'm about finished, I'm ready for another one!
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Post by Okie Stokie. on Dec 19, 2014 15:52:04 GMT
I ain't got a clue what is going on here. So with regret I'm rolling on.
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Post by localloser on Dec 19, 2014 16:05:54 GMT
It must be a common problem for stokies though based on the amount of time you're waiting for them to finish pissing. I think it would seriously bother me if I had to spend that amount of time just waiting. Although I am 26 now, about what age do you lose the ability to have a piss in a timely fashion? 27
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Post by Northy on Dec 19, 2014 16:38:15 GMT
Don't spill those contents on jammers like your coffee
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Post by Billybigbollox on Dec 19, 2014 16:39:14 GMT
So I'm now a young 49yr old......went to hospital to have a kidney stone removed that was blocking my kidney exit in all their wisdom they decided to go up my jap, through my prostate, through my bladder and rayt up to my kidney with what can only be described as a bike inner tube (Stent) obviously, I had to have a temp catheter to shift all the blood etc so I could piss again.....it worked.....it fucking wrecked too (talk about curled up toes) It was "temporary" so later they could go up with a lazer, camera ....kitchen sink etc and destroy said stone So nearly 12 months later no news on operation, I'm working away boarding a ceiling and I get kidney pains and a constant urge to piss.......only the piss turns out to be blood. back I go to urology who sheepishly smile and say, "oops, shouldn't have been in this long, we must have lost you......your body is rejecting the stent (rofl)Oh how we laughed Emergency op then....I'm finally getting this bolder and inner tube taken out after op they sent me home very next day I couldn't piss....but I was bosting.....off to A&E......eventually after dying for a piss for about 4 hours they found a nurse that could cathertise me........toe curler Skip forward...Tell me me that my prostate has enlarged ......I asked because of op?.......oh no mr frase..... There must have been some underlining problem before.....yeh right, you fucking butchers. go home with catheter on tap and a bag for night time then we'll have to lazer your prostate ....at a later date i said..." Woah, hold on there krippen" can an we see after I've healed a bit if I can piss on my own first krippin ... "Ok we owe you that I suppose come back in 10 weeks.....10 weeks with a tube and tap as a penis Krippen...."nurse will explain how you have sex wearing a catheter" Dunner wriggle too much duck you might turn me tap on. anyway...after 10 weeks I could piss...albeit only half flow so now I go for water flow tests every six month because they Conner wait to operate all fine so far but, he always insists on putting his finger up my bum on these days.....while gently inserting a finger, he slowly leans over my shoulder a whispers in my neck...."mmmm....your prostate is fantastic" (((shivers))) we we have a fag and a coffee after and say our goodbyes until 6months time God bless the NHS eh......not thank you for reading to be continued......if I'm still here My misses had that. I wonder if her prostate is playing up? Are you sure that was his finger up your 'arris Fraise?
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 17:01:02 GMT
Don't spill those contents on jammers like your coffee I throw it on him as iften as I can to stop him talking I know you're lurking jam
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 17:03:02 GMT
So I'm now a young 49yr old......went to hospital to have a kidney stone removed that was blocking my kidney exit in all their wisdom they decided to go up my jap, through my prostate, through my bladder and rayt up to my kidney with what can only be described as a bike inner tube (Stent) obviously, I had to have a temp catheter to shift all the blood etc so I could piss again.....it worked.....it fucking wrecked too (talk about curled up toes) It was "temporary" so later they could go up with a lazer, camera ....kitchen sink etc and destroy said stone So nearly 12 months later no news on operation, I'm working away boarding a ceiling and I get kidney pains and a constant urge to piss.......only the piss turns out to be blood. back I go to urology who sheepishly smile and say, "oops, shouldn't have been in this long, we must have lost you......your body is rejecting the stent (rofl)Oh how we laughed Emergency op then....I'm finally getting this bolder and inner tube taken out after op they sent me home very next day I couldn't piss....but I was bosting.....off to A&E......eventually after dying for a piss for about 4 hours they found a nurse that could cathertise me........toe curler Skip forward...Tell me me that my prostate has enlarged ......I asked because of op?.......oh no mr frase..... There must have been some underlining problem before.....yeh right, you fucking butchers. go home with catheter on tap and a bag for night time then we'll have to lazer your prostate ....at a later date i said..." Woah, hold on there krippen" can an we see after I've healed a bit if I can piss on my own first krippin ... "Ok we owe you that I suppose come back in 10 weeks.....10 weeks with a tube and tap as a penis Krippen...."nurse will explain how you have sex wearing a catheter" Dunner wriggle too much duck you might turn me tap on. anyway...after 10 weeks I could piss...albeit only half flow so now I go for water flow tests every six month because they Conner wait to operate all fine so far but, he always insists on putting his finger up my bum on these days.....while gently inserting a finger, he slowly leans over my shoulder a whispers in my neck...."mmmm....your prostate is fantastic" (((shivers))) we we have a fag and a coffee after and say our goodbyes until 6months time God bless the NHS eh......not thank you for reading to be continued......if I'm still here My misses had that. I wonder if her prostate is playing up? Are you sure that was his finger up your 'arris Fraise? Definitely finger, I saw him smell them after .....could have been a couple tho
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Post by kidcrewbob on Dec 19, 2014 18:07:49 GMT
Hit and miss the NHS - some great dedicated folk but unfortunately many idiots and inadequates - just dont get sick at a weekend ......
You can chuck no end of cash at it and it will get no better cos it's too feckin big and completely unmanageable. Add to that ridiculous levels of demand and unreasonable expectation you have chaos and ultimately meltdown.
But no politician has the balls to reform it properly because the sheeple with their crazy nostalgic 1950s view of the NHS will start bleating and vote them straight out..
Ditto the BBC.....an anachronism.....
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Post by Orbs on Dec 19, 2014 18:09:55 GMT
I wonder if you'll die before you delete again?
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Post by Gods on Dec 19, 2014 18:19:09 GMT
Hit and miss the NHS - some great dedicated folk but unfortunately many idiots and inadequates - just dont get sick at a weekend ...... You can chuck no end of cash at it and it will get no better cos it's too feckin big and completely unmanageable. Add to that ridiculous levels of demand and unreasonable expectation you have chaos and ultimately meltdown. But no politician has the balls to reform it properly because the sheeple with their crazy nostalgic 1950s view of the NHS will start bleating and vote them straight out.. Ditto the BBC.....an anachronism..... Did you cut and paste that from something I wrote on here about 3 years ago
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