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Post by Trouserdog on Mar 13, 2014 19:45:26 GMT
It's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):-
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended?
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why?
6) What are your top 3 albums?
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)?
8) What are your top 3 films?
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen?
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex?
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Post by madelinesmithmmmh on Mar 13, 2014 19:59:59 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? v Luton Town, 1963 to seal promotion.
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Semi final v Bolton was good, Leeds in 73
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? I'd be alarmed about DadofSam, he's a big lad
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? I'm about the same speed as Paul Stewart and the build is getting there
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Lose an eye and an ear, please. Deaf, I can lipread
6) What are your top 3 albums? Led Zep 2, Sticky Fingers and there's a good prog on Classic Albums on the iPlayer so Aqualung by Jethro Tull (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b03xq2kn)
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Never seen it. But I'll take Richard Feynman, Talulah Bankhead, Linda Ronstedt and Huddy.
8) What are your top 3 films? Jaws, Godfather (II?), Cabaret
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Paul Stewart and rather too many from around that time to mention.
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Is there a limit to the length of a response? Postman once overheard me singing "You don't make friends with salad" (from the Simpsons) and complemented me on being happy. I think it was about a week after I was coitally engaged.
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Post by numpty40 on Mar 13, 2014 20:01:55 GMT
No.3 - Waking up next to Old Stokie would be pretty traumatic.
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Post by Trouserdog on Mar 13, 2014 20:02:20 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Stoke 5 Sheff Utd 2 1986/87. Not a bad start! 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Go to be the Bolton semi-final. 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Stafford Stokie. I've heard about what he gets up to in Premier Inns with his gay mates. 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Any that are out of shape, ugly and going bald. Charlie Adam then. 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf. I'd miss looking at porn too much. 6) What are your top 3 albums? The Cure- Disintegration, The Doors- The Doors, Bloc Party- A Weekend in the City 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Ross Noble, Muhammad Ali (when he was well, obviously) and Lou Macari. 8) What are your top 3 films? It's a Wonderful Life, The Pianist, The Shawshank Redemption 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Vincent Pericard 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Thankfully after the act, but it has to be letting out a sneaky fart when naked and following through. Read more: oatcakefanzine.proboards.com/thread/227904/big-oatcake-interview-10#ixzz2vsFymXG3
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Post by pyrus on Mar 13, 2014 20:09:34 GMT
LllIt's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):- 1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? v. Palace about 1969 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? should be the 72 final, but it is the FA Cup Semi v Bolton. 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? I'd shag you all 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Geoff Hurst 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Neither, I need my eyes for work and football and my ears for music 6) What are your top 3 albums? Highway 61 - Dylan London Calling - The Clash Armed Forces - Elvis Costello 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Jesus, Buddah, Allah and Sir Stanley Matthews 8) What are your top 3 films? Street Car Named Desire District 9 Macbeth (1976 version with. Paul Scofield) 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Paul Stewart 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? thought I would drop a silent fart, but shit the bed instead Read more: oatcakefanzine.proboards.com/thread/227904/big-oatcake-interview-10#ixzz2vsHGj5py
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Post by kitkatkev on Mar 13, 2014 20:26:48 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Stoke Boro in 80's I think won away 3-1 Crooks scored twice
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?
Bolton Away Villa home Pulis turning up at HT and Huth's goal was fantastic
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?
Sergeant Muttley
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?
Kevin Keen
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why?
Deaf because then I don't have to listen to some of the moaning at the games
6) What are your top 3 albums?
Best OF Best of Rod Stewart, Joshua tree U2, No Dice Bad finger
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)?
Tony Pulis, Billy Connolly, Felicity Kenddal and WENGER TO TAKE PISS OUT OF
8) What are your top 3 films? Forrest Gump, Yong Frankenstein, Kes
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Danny Collins
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex?
Woke up with A woman did not know her name (pissed) went through her bag see if I could find something that tell me her name you guessed it got caught
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Post by TheWiseMaster on Mar 13, 2014 20:38:22 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Can't remember exactly but I do remember winger Coleman scoring 7 goals - I was an infant lol!
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Few to chose from but the promotion win at Notts County was brilliant for its late goal
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Winger (he's gone) lol
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Dennis Smith in my mind
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf - would miss the whinging but still enjoy the sights
6) What are your top 3 albums? - artists - Buddy Holly, Lennon and PlanB
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Lou Macari, Wedggie Benn, Enoch Powell, Cheryl Cole, Mrs Crouch, Ricardo
8) What are your top 3 films? Field of Dreams, Don't Look Now, Girl with Dragon Tattoo
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? one of the Iceland wingers
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Falling asleep at a critical point - too much beer!
That was hard work!
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Post by harryburrows on Mar 13, 2014 21:03:21 GMT
It's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):- 1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? 1967 v Blackpool 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Bolton semi 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Minniethemooch , he's a perv as we know 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Big john , 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf I think at least you would be able to watch stoke 6) What are your top 3 albums? Who's next , led zep 4 Springsteen , the river 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Peter Ustinov , bette midler , Alan Hudson 8) What are your top 3 films? Shawshank redemption , the godfather , clockwork orange 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Iwulumo 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Called my new wife my old wife's name , it was as bad as it could be , on honeymoon as well
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Post by scfcno1fan on Mar 13, 2014 21:08:50 GMT
It's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):- 1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? 1967 v Blackpool 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Bolton semi 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Minniethemooch , he's a perv as we know 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Big john , 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf I think at least you would be able to watch stoke 6) What are your top 3 albums? Who's next , led zep 4 Springsteen , the river 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Peter Ustinov , bette midler , Alan Hudson 8) What are your top 3 films? Shawshank redemption , the godfather , clockwork orange 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Iwulumo 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Called my new wife my old wife's name , it was as bad as it could be , on honeymoon as well
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Post by Deleted on Mar 13, 2014 21:18:19 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Honestly can't remember. My old man took me to a few games at The Vic as a kid but I was too young to recollect my first match. I have memories of being lifted up plenty by my Dad so I could see but I don't recall the first team I saw us against, or the result. My first full game, that I can remember almost everything from, was the first league game at The Brit. Expectations were high; this was a new chapter for the club. Sir Stan was on the pitch prior to kick-off, there was a buzz around the ground and the place was full of optimism and hope... We lost 2-1 to Swindon and went onto get relegated. Lovely stuff. 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Tough one. Lots to pick from. I'd probably go for 5-0, Bolton - Wembley. It was just surreal. We never do things that easy!! Unbelievable performance, sensational atmosphere and memories made that I will savour until my last breath. 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Sheikhmomo - the daft cu.... 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Mama - honest, hard working, reliable, big smile.......bit shit. 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf (especially if mcf is around). I couldn't do with being in the dark all the time (like mcf). 6) What are your top 3 albums? What's the Story - Oasis Bring it on - Gomez Youth and young manhood - KoL 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Quentin Tarantino Bill Murray Robert de Niro Peter Thorne (first hero) 8) What are your top 3 films? Pulp Fiction Silence of the Lambs Se7en (althought I could list about 100! - movie geek) 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Glenn fu**ing Whelan... Marco Gabbiadini. Utter arse gravy. 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Couldn't possibly say on here. (PM me )
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Post by foxysgloves on Mar 13, 2014 21:20:36 GMT
It's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):- 1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Stoke 2 Villa 3 1983 or 84.....I think. 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Stoke 5 Bolton 0 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Any poster with an obsession with strap ons, sado masochism and a Gimp mask avatar would be kicked out of bed fairly fast. 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? A cross between Graham Potter, John Butler and Mike Sheron. The bad bits of each 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Blind.....despite his obvious blindness Pugsley seems a happy soul so it can't be all bad. 6) What are your top 3 albums? New Order - Technique Stone Roses - Stone Roses Charlatans - Tellin Stories 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? RAF, Pugsley, Waitingforwaddo and Dave Bamber. I'm a shit cook so feeding them in the knowledge that they'll spend the nest 24 hours on the bog would make up for losing the dosh. 8) What are your top 3 films? Alien One flew over the cuckoo's nest Escape to Victory 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Paul Williams. Holy fuck!!!! 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Stoke losing at Torquay. That was so embarrassing.....the sex made up for it though. Read more: oatcakefanzine.proboards.com/thread/227904/big-oatcake-interview-10#ixzz2vsXFHcop
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Post by Deleted on Mar 13, 2014 21:20:57 GMT
It's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):- 1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? 6) What are your top 3 albums? 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? 8) What are your top 3 films? 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? 1) Stoke 0 West Brom 3. Forget the exact year but remember it was a night match and early eighties. 2) Hard to say but I'd probably go for seeing us at Wembley for the first time in the Autoglass final in 92. 3) Mickmillslovechild,I can just imagine him waffling on for ages about nothing whilst I'm trying to get my morning wank in. 4) Kenny Lowe,both of us in our prime,were about as fit as Jocky Wilson after marathon five setter up Jollies. 5) Deaf,I seriously can't imagine ever not being able to see again,and being born blind doesn't even bare thinking about,that must be worse than not being able to hear. 6) The Stone Roses - The Stone Roses Definitely Maybe - Oasis Telling Stories - The Charlatans 7) Kylie Minogue,the other guests would be told the wrong address and I would set about getting her as pissed as possible. 8) Pulp Fiction,the best film ever made True Romance and Goodfellas 9) Another tough one as there have been plenty of shit players in my time as a Stoke fan,but the one that sticks out in my mind more than any other is Keith Scott,he was frigging awful. 10) Not sure if this was embarrassing as such but it was certainly a strange moment. I pulled a bird once after football training one night in my local pub back in the day. I ended up back at hers which was a terraced house just down the road from the pub,she shut the stairs door and it wanna long before I was balls deep going at it like a sewing machine in front of the fire. Next thing I know is the stairs door being flung open,and when I turned around there stood a bloke(who will remain nameless)who I used to work with less than 6 months previous! I was banging his missus,we looked at each other and he just slumped to his knees saying something along the lines of "I can't believe it I know him". My kegs and tracky bottoms were up sharpish and I legged it out the door and the daft cow even tried to give me a card with her number on!!! To this day I can't believe he didn't just kick my head in. That was the strangest experience I've ever had sex wise anyway
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Post by foxysgloves on Mar 13, 2014 21:33:18 GMT
It's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):- 1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? 6) What are your top 3 albums? 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? 8) What are your top 3 films? 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? 1) Stoke 0 West Brom 3. Forget the exact year but remember it was a night match and early eighties. 2) Hard to say but I'd probably go for seeing us at Wembley for the first time in the Autoglass final in 92. 3) Mickmillslovechild,I can just imagine him waffling on for ages about nothing whilst I'm trying to get my morning wank in. 4) Kenny Lowe,both of us in our prime,were about as fit as Jocky Wilson after marathon five setter up Jollies. 5) Deaf,I seriously can't imagine ever not being able to see again,and being born blind doesn't even bare thinking about,that must be worse than not being able to hear. 6) The Stone Roses - The Stone Roses Definitely Maybe - Oasis Telling Stories - The Charlatans 7) Kylie Minogue,the other guests would be told the wrong address and I would set about getting her as pissed as possible. 8) Pulp Fiction,the best film ever made True Romance and Goodfellas 9) Another tough one as there have been plenty of shit players in my time as a Stoke fan,but the one that sticks out in my mind more than any other is Keith Scott,he was frigging awful. 10) Not sure if this was embarrassing as such but it was certainly a strange moment. I pulled a bird once after football training one night in my local pub back in the day. I ended up back at hers which was a terraced house just down the road from the pub,she shut the stairs door and it wanna long before I was balls deep going at it like a sewing machine in front of the fire. Next thing I know is the stairs door being flung open,and when I turned around there stood a bloke(who will remain nameless)who I used to work with less than 6 months previous! I was banging his missus,we looked at each other and he just slumped to his knees saying something along the lines of "I can't believe it I know him". My kegs and tracky bottoms were up sharpish and I legged it out the door and the daft cow even tried to give me a card with her number on!!! To this day I can't believe he didn't just kick my head in. That was the strangest experience I've ever had sex wise anyway OMG OMG OMG!!!!!! We share two out of three fave albums!!!! This can't be!!!! It's like Harry Potter and Voldemort finding out they both love Grand Designs!!! Nooooooooooo!!!!!
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Post by Deleted on Mar 13, 2014 21:42:41 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Stoke 2-0 Liverpool in 84 I think. I liked Liverpool so my dad took me. That all changed.
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Stoke 5-0 Bolton. I cried (a bit).
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? MCF, especially if it was anything smaller than a Deluxe XXXL Sized bed.
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Steve Bould
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf. I think a lot of visible beauty is beheld so your eyes are important. If I was deaf, I could get by better.
6) What are your top 3 albums? It's too difficult to pick 3, maybe 33?
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Asmir Begovic; Louis Theroux; Lennox Lewis; Morrissey; Kathy Burke (how many are you allowed?)
8) What are your top 3 films? Goodfellas; Fear & Loathing...; Snatch :-)
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Gordon Marshall, or in terms of outfield, Paul Stewart, there's fucking loads.
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? When I was 15 I had the chance to nail my then-girlfriend in the school holidays. All prepared, I went round, did all the lead-up, then jizzed on her before I'd even had chance to get busy. That's all that springs to mind...:-)
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Post by Deleted on Mar 13, 2014 21:49:59 GMT
1) Stoke 0 West Brom 3. Forget the exact year but remember it was a night match and early eighties. 2) Hard to say but I'd probably go for seeing us at Wembley for the first time in the Autoglass final in 92. 3) Mickmillslovechild,I can just imagine him waffling on for ages about nothing whilst I'm trying to get my morning wank in. 4) Kenny Lowe,both of us in our prime,were about as fit as Jocky Wilson after marathon five setter up Jollies. 5) Deaf,I seriously can't imagine ever not being able to see again,and being born blind doesn't even bare thinking about,that must be worse than not being able to hear. 6) The Stone Roses - The Stone Roses Definitely Maybe - Oasis Telling Stories - The Charlatans 7) Kylie Minogue,the other guests would be told the wrong address and I would set about getting her as pissed as possible. 8) Pulp Fiction,the best film ever made True Romance and Goodfellas 9) Another tough one as there have been plenty of shit players in my time as a Stoke fan,but the one that sticks out in my mind more than any other is Keith Scott,he was frigging awful. 10) Not sure if this was embarrassing as such but it was certainly a strange moment. I pulled a bird once after football training one night in my local pub back in the day. I ended up back at hers which was a terraced house just down the road from the pub,she shut the stairs door and it wanna long before I was balls deep going at it like a sewing machine in front of the fire. Next thing I know is the stairs door being flung open,and when I turned around there stood a bloke(who will remain nameless)who I used to work with less than 6 months previous! I was banging his missus,we looked at each other and he just slumped to his knees saying something along the lines of "I can't believe it I know him". My kegs and tracky bottoms were up sharpish and I legged it out the door and the daft cow even tried to give me a card with her number on!!! To this day I can't believe he didn't just kick my head in. That was the strangest experience I've ever had sex wise anyway OMG OMG OMG!!!!!! We share two out of three fave albums!!!! This can't be!!!! It's like Harry Potter and Voldemort finding out they both love Grand Designs!!! Nooooooooooo!!!!! Ha ha don't be too alarmed Foxy's Behind all the bollocks I write on here,I'm cool as fuck and a pretty decent bloke
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Post by itsmorethanagame on Mar 13, 2014 21:52:46 GMT
It's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):- 1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Think it was Barnsley in FA Cup mid/late 80's. Think we won 1-0 but I really can't remember. Just remember standing at the front of the Boothen and getting crushed on the railings when we scored. Was hooked from that moment on. 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? One of the Wembley ones I suppose. Probably Stockport in the Autoglass. It was my birthday, had the new top that day, red hot and Steino did the rest. 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Any f the moaners. I have enough of that off the mrs first thing in the morning 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Maybe an uglier Guidetti. Got the same gut though. 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Death. 6) What are your top 3 albums? Anything from Bob Marley, the Pogues, the Who. Nice mix for all moods there. 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Gazza, Mickey Thomas, Cat Deeley, Tina off Coronation St 8) What are your top 3 films? Donne Brasco, Platoon, Step Brothers 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Kyle Lightbourne was up there 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? After doing the deed with one I picked up with the beer goggles on, I decided to do a sharp exit once she dropped off. On leaving I got my shoe lace stuck in the door in my rush. I promptly unlaced the shoe and toddled off with a loose trainer. I only lived a few doors down and she knocked on the following day with shoe lace in hand. Caught red handed. Read more: oatcakefanzine.proboards.com/thread/227904/big-oatcake-interview-10#ixzz2vshvqD9p
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Post by sheikhmomo on Mar 13, 2014 21:55:10 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended?
Honestly don't know anymore I used to know but my brain has decided that's not the job for him anymore it would have been about 1977 as a young sprog. I remember the pitch was so green that I nearly fainted, we lost and I had seven pisses which pleased my old man. I could still smell the ground at school on Monday and spent weeks drawing what I remembered but I haven't got a fucking clue who we played. I might go and see a hypnotist, not one who makes you eat an onion and think its an apple, a remembering things one.
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?
The Graham Shaw one against Liverpool in early 88. A game we should have won against the best team in the country. I was 15 by then but it was an attack on the senses in the Boothen that day. It made me think anything was possible with this club, even though the holocaust season was still fresh in the mind. Then 4 years later the Premier League came along and crushed everyone's dreams.
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?
Any of those Tory cunts on the GDB. Orange swallowing, fishnet stocking strangling, 'wank me off in this zipped sports bag' merchants to a man
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?
Neville Southall's big boned brother
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why?
Blind. I like Labradors.
6) What are your top 3 albums?
Eight Legged Groove Machine, Treasure, Revolver
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)?
Tony Scholes and Kris Commons for Asbestos Burgers
8) What are your top 3 films?
Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 1 Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 2 Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 3
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen?
Paul Williams
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex?
I was with a young Asian Lady and emptied the spaff cannons in her boat but I had a bad diet at the time and was drinking a lot of cider, the consequence was that the sticky white love wee resembled some sort of turpentine, bubbled a bit and lifted the pigment from her skin. Maybe those tory cunts on the GDB board want to vote for me rather than Nigel fucking Firage. *
*some of the above is made up.
I fucking hate Revolver.
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Post by foxysgloves on Mar 13, 2014 21:56:57 GMT
OMG OMG OMG!!!!!! We share two out of three fave albums!!!! This can't be!!!! It's like Harry Potter and Voldemort finding out they both love Grand Designs!!! Nooooooooooo!!!!! Ha ha don't be too alarmed Foxy's Behind all the bollocks I write on here,I'm cool as fuck and a pretty decent bloke Only messing mate. You can't be all bad with that kinda musical taste!!!
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Post by Mint Berry Barks on Mar 13, 2014 22:41:36 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended?
Some game against Gillingham not long after the Brit had opened. It was boring.
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?
Leeds 0 - 4 Stoke
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?
Tazi. I'd imagine he'd have dribbled all over my sheets. (from the mouth and his minge, which are the same thing)
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?
I've always considered myself to have nice hair like Carl Hoefkens, so probably Carl Hoefkens.
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why?
Both, so I could develop almost superhuman-like senses of taste, smell and especially touch. I would legally change my name to The Feeler and I would go around "feeling crime as it was about to happen". Possibly with giant novelty white Mickey Mouse gloves to emphasis my ability, although that would reduce practicality somewhat, but it'd be pretty cool.
6) What are your top 3 albums?
Whatever people say I am, that's what I'm not - Arctic Monkeys The Grey Album - Danger Mouse Chronic 2001 - Dr Dre
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)?
That guy who played John Locke on Lost to ask him why his acting career has been so awful since.
Charles Dance to ask him why his acting career has been so good, and to make Locke jealous.
Jeremy Paxman as long as he had that fantastic beard.
James Beattie because he'd be fun probably.
8) What are your top 3 films?
In Bruges, Hot Fuzz and Filth.
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen?
Ant Pulis Jnr.
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex?
Almost being in tears as a lady of the night clawed my backne when I was a teen.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 13, 2014 22:53:46 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended?
Newcastle Boxing Day 89'
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?
Bolton Semi final.
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?
Anyone that supports current or past manager's before the club.
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?
Jon Parkin.
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why?
Deaf. Couldnt hear the missus but could still see the lads!
6) What are your top 3 albums?
Too many to mention. Definitely Maybe is one. Couldn't pick another two.
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)?
Brian Clough, Muhammad Ali and Vince Overson.
8) What are your top 3 films?
Saving Private Ryan, Snatch and Saw.
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen?
John Clark.
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex?
Not having enough cash for the hotel room...
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Moosehead
Youth Player
Posts: 308
Location: Nottingham
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Post by Moosehead on Mar 13, 2014 23:06:45 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Not sure...it was in the Alan Ball Division 3 campaign though. 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? Hoekstra 3 Reading 0 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Trouserdog...he once sung a song about pissing the bed in his sleep, wouldn't want to risk it 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Until Per Mertersaker signs I would say a mix of Peter Crouch and James O' Connor 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf, no decent music is made any more, and most of what people talk is bollocks nowadays. 6) What are your top 3 albums? Fun Lovin' Criminals - Come Find Yourself / The Tragically Hip - Phantom Power / Willy Mason - Where the Humans Eat 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Bruce Springsteen, David Millar, Peter Hoekstra 8) What are your top 3 films? In Bruges, Sideways, Pulp Fiction 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Gordon Marshall 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Waking up realising I'm not in my own bed, falling out of said bed, and landing on and breaking an expensive pair of the lady in questions sunglasses... Read more: oatcakefanzine.proboards.com/thread/227904/big-oatcake-interview-10#ixzz2vsvHjQVw
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Post by salopstick on Mar 13, 2014 23:34:59 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Honestly don't know anymore I used to know but my brain has decided that's not the job for him anymore it would have been about 1977 as a young sprog. I remember the pitch was so green that I nearly fainted, we lost and I had seven pisses which pleased my old man. I could still smell the ground at school on Monday and spent weeks drawing what I remembered but I haven't got a fucking clue who we played. I might go and see a hypnotist, not one who makes you eat an onion and think its an apple, a remembering things one. 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? The Graham Shaw one against Liverpool in early 88. A game we should have won against the best team in the country. I was 15 by then but it was an attack on the senses in the Boothen that day. It made me think anything was possible with this club, even though the holocaust season was still fresh in the mind. Then 4 years later the Premier League came along and crushed everyone's dreams. 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Any of those Tory cunts on the GDB. Orange swallowing, fishnet stocking strangling, 'wank me off in this zipped sports bag' merchants to a man 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Neville Southall's big boned brother 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Blind. I like Labradors. 6) What are your top 3 albums? Eight Legged Groove Machine, Treasure, Revolver 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Tony Scholes and Kris Commons for Asbestos Burgers 8) What are your top 3 films? Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 1 Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 2 Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 3 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Paul Williams 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? I was with a young Asian Lady and emptied the spaff cannons in her boat but I had a bad diet at the time and was drinking a lot of cider, the consequence was that the sticky white love wee resembled some sort of turpentine, bubbled a bit and lifted the pigment from her skin. Maybe those tory cunts on the GDB board want to vote for me rather than Nigel fucking Firage. * *some of the above is made up. I fucking hate Revolver. The Tory cunts on the GDB have infinitely more taste
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Post by sheikhmomo on Mar 14, 2014 0:02:08 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Honestly don't know anymore I used to know but my brain has decided that's not the job for him anymore it would have been about 1977 as a young sprog. I remember the pitch was so green that I nearly fainted, we lost and I had seven pisses which pleased my old man. I could still smell the ground at school on Monday and spent weeks drawing what I remembered but I haven't got a fucking clue who we played. I might go and see a hypnotist, not one who makes you eat an onion and think its an apple, a remembering things one. 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? The Graham Shaw one against Liverpool in early 88. A game we should have won against the best team in the country. I was 15 by then but it was an attack on the senses in the Boothen that day. It made me think anything was possible with this club, even though the holocaust season was still fresh in the mind. Then 4 years later the Premier League came along and crushed everyone's dreams. 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? Any of those Tory cunts on the GDB. Orange swallowing, fishnet stocking strangling, 'wank me off in this zipped sports bag' merchants to a man 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? Neville Southall's big boned brother 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Blind. I like Labradors. 6) What are your top 3 albums? Eight Legged Groove Machine, Treasure, Revolver 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Tony Scholes and Kris Commons for Asbestos Burgers 8) What are your top 3 films? Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 1 Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 2 Harriet Potter and the Philosophers Bone 3 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Paul Williams 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? I was with a young Asian Lady and emptied the spaff cannons in her boat but I had a bad diet at the time and was drinking a lot of cider, the consequence was that the sticky white love wee resembled some sort of turpentine, bubbled a bit and lifted the pigment from her skin. Maybe those tory cunts on the GDB board want to vote for me rather than Nigel fucking Firage. * *some of the above is made up. I fucking hate Revolver. The Tory cunts on the GDB have infinitely more taste Don't tell me you don't like the Eight Legged Groove Machine? You fucking monster!
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Post by salopstick on Mar 14, 2014 0:18:07 GMT
No but rubber soul is better
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Post by sheikhmomo on Mar 14, 2014 0:24:35 GMT
No but rubber soul is better I'll give you If I Needed Someone.
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Post by whereami on Mar 14, 2014 0:47:09 GMT
It's a slow Thursday, so let's all get to know each other a little better. Copy and paste the questions below (and answer them as well you fucking fools):-
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended?
portsmouth in the last few years at the Vic, 95 maybe
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?
Man City cup game where Kitson + Tuncay scored, we soaked up what they had and gradually forced our will on them. Also the Birmingham game in the last year at the Vic, classic winter game, a 45 minute "Lou Macari's barmy army" in the second half in the Boothen, the start of the forecast 10cm of snow started during the game and I thought school would be closed the day after. and a 1-0 win.
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?
Any "Rimmer". Pulis support aside, the name says it all.
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?
got longish hair so, the on-loan Gerry Mcmahon
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why?
Deaf. Most conversations are small talk anyway.
6) What are your top 3 albums?
Deftones - Diamond Eyes Ozzy Osbourne - Blizzard of Oz Rage Against the Machine - Rage Against the Machine
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)?
Neville Southall - if any Stoke player knew decent food when he saw it, it'd be him Nikola Tesla a dark ages viking kings chef, to provide enough pig and cow to keep Southall happy. and for the rest of us. and cause i reckon they knew how to tell a story back then. John Bonham Eliza Dushku from about 10 years ago.. none of the above could out charm me... John Bonham would long since have passed out. At a pinch, current Eliza Dushku would be more than satisfactory
8) What are your top 3 films?
True Romance Things To Do In Denver When Youre Dead Desperado
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen?
David Oldfield for consistency. The Whittle/Muggleton pairing for chuckle brother comedy duo stakes.
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex?
Being violently, violently sick seconds after finishing. For every reason you're probably imagining.
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Post by StokieAsh13 on Mar 14, 2014 1:00:14 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Final game at the Vic on the 4th May 1997 vs West Brom we won 2-1. I was only 6 & at full time saw my dad & loads of blokes with tears in their eyes, not having the slightest clue why. 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?
Valencia away, special atmosphere, great few days, didn't care about the result. Real proud moment watching our team walk out onto that pitch.
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?
StaffordStokie - Just the thought of him having turned my whole room into a TP Shrine. 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?
Ryan Shawcross
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf, couldn't imagine not being able to see my daughter grow up in front of me.
6) What are your top 3 albums?
Out Of The Blue - Electric Light Orchestra Definitely Maybe - Oasis The 1975 - 1975
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? Martin Scorsese Steven Spielberg Asmir Begovic
8) What are your top 3 films? Shawshank Redemption Inception Goodfellas
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? John Parkin 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? Whilst being absolutely hammered, I rang & told me mrs to be ready for me when I arrived back at her mothers who we were living with at the time. Casually strolled in, walked up stairs, stripped right down & started doing my thing, only then to realise I was in the wrong bed trying it with her mother! Couldn't believe it. Safe to say I had to do a lot of apologising, although I think her mum secretly liked it
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Post by PotterLog on Mar 14, 2014 2:35:00 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended? Not totally sure about the very first, but one of the earliest was Coventry in the cup the year they won it. I can remember a strong sense of injustice that we had played so well against a top flight team and yet still lost. And Brian Kilkline's hair.
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game? I'll go for '92 Autoglass Final. I loved Steino so much.
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning? It's a tie.
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble? SJE
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why? Deaf. I'd miss music but I can always hum to myself in my head.
6) What are your top 3 albums? Ugh, too difficult... these three are good: Blue, Joni Mitchell Physical Graffiti, Led Zep The Shape of Punk to Come, Refused
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)? I'd just want it to be a laugh... erm.. Crouchy, Christopher Hitchens, Elise Andrew and Judi Dench.
8) What are your top 3 films? Ugh, too difficult... these three are good: There Will Be Blood Sexy Beast Clockwork Orange
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen? Depends on one's criteria but if it's on actual technique with a ball then Justin Whittle, although I appreciate he was quite good for us at the time. Shows you don't actually have to be able to *play football* to carve out a living as *a footballer*, if you know what I mean.
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex? A gang of lads erupting in 'spontaneous' applause, having been stood there watching may un' marlady in what we thought was an out-of-the-way field at a music festival. As it happens, I was dressed in full Stoke kit at the time.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2014 2:58:25 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended?v Wet Sham first game 1975/76 season (I was FINALLY going to be OLD ENOUGH later that year!!) - Don't remember a single thing about it 2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?One I was not there to see in the flesh. It was the Bolton semi-final ... the point at which even Joe had to accept that we'd need plane tickets back wom 3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?This is a great shame ... I've only had it happen to me the once and it wasn't the person I'd least like it to be. Another reverse-ambition dashed. So, anyway, I guess the answer would be OS, as I would have no doubt been kept up half the night with his constant, fruitless trips to the bog 4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?Lee Chapman. 5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why?Deaf. Because I'd still be able to look at the other half's beautiful face; without having to listen to what's coming out of the hole in the middle of it! 6) What are your top 3 albums?* Fore! - Huey Lewis & the News * Cookin' On The Roof - Roman Holliday * Alf - Alison Moyet (It's not my fault they were the ones on top ... The Other Half insists on moving stuff if it remains in plain sight, unused, for longer than 17 seconds). 7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)?I have never seen this programme, how many do I need? Will two do? Tony Pulis Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarl Asaba (Just mainly so Their Tone would have to say Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarl half the night) 8) What are your top 3 films?Oh Jebus ... Can I not have like 20, or something ... just 3!!? Too hard, sorry 9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen?I used to think it was Indigo Jones, when I was little; but to be fair it probably wasn't. Bless the man, but he was such a disappointment! 10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex?(sigh) There's always one question in these surveys that I have to respond to with, "Not Applicable"; it's just not fair
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Post by baltipiesmuggler on Mar 14, 2014 8:46:42 GMT
1) What was the first Stoke game you attended?
Genuinely can't remember - something truly dire I'd imagine
2) What's your favourite ever Stoke game?
Stoke City 2 - 1 Manchester Utd... No more required
3) Which Oatcake poster would you least like to find in your bed when you wake up in the morning?
Frankly, most of us are foul mouthed deviants, so I'm opting for none please
4) Which Stoke player, past or present, do you most closely resemble?
I'm the white Jon Walters, but fatter
5) If you had to be blind or deaf which would you choose and why?
Deaf, as I'd want to see my boy grow up
6) What are your top 3 albums?
Jeff Buckley - Grace, Radiohead - The Bends, Ben Folds Five - Ben Folds Five
7)If you were on 'Come Dine With Me' who would your ideal dinner guests be- including one Stoke player (past or present)?
Boris Johnson, Zach Braff & Ricardo Fuller (Rice & Peas)
8) What are your top 3 films?
The Usual Suspects, Aliens, Garden State
9) Who is the worst Stoke player you've ever seen?
Mr Vincent Pericard
10) What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you during, before or after having sex?
No comment
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