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Post by ben88 on Mar 18, 2008 14:08:03 GMT
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:10:31 GMT
Although he's gone,
His memory lingers,
I'll remember his beard,
And his fishy fingers
God bless the hirsuite mariner who brought us his freshest produce, before covering them in batter and producing the greatest post-pub snack in christendom.
When he died, a little part in all of us went. terrible shame. Was it the drink that took him? he was fucking horrible after a jar you know.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:12:48 GMT
He was a racist cunt.
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:13:24 GMT
Still, all must be forgiven.
He's with Cod now.
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Post by BrianLeicsStokie on Mar 18, 2008 14:15:27 GMT
Always thought he was a bit of a deviant.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:16:14 GMT
You can never forgive him for all those helpless creatures that he battered.
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:19:15 GMT
You're being very harsh.
What is the world coming to if a man cannot enjoy a mixture of Haddock & Breadcrumbs in the privacy of his own house?
Fucking Labour Government. And you all buy into it!!! Government fucking stooges!!!!!!
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:21:14 GMT
I'm not being harsh, I just can't forgive him for his acts.
The worlds a better place now the americans and ourselves have ridded it of him.
The iraqi people can now be free.
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Post by ben88 on Mar 18, 2008 14:24:20 GMT
apparently he topped himself, he was wanted for questioning over shannon mathews
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:26:24 GMT
There are 25 Million Shite Muslims who'd disagree with you there.
One man's maniac is another messiah. You'd be as well remembering that, particularly in light of your own recent "experiments".
You are fucking with Mother Nature. Dark forces are at work and i fear for your safety.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:26:36 GMT
He was a bad man, Ghandi would have smacked him in the head.
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Post by salopstick on Mar 18, 2008 14:28:19 GMT
he looked like my uncle andy
only he wasnt really my uncle andy, just some bloke who used to shag my nana
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:32:58 GMT
Ghandi might have smacked him on the head, but the Dalai Lama used to play Crib with him every Tuesday, so what does that tell you? Who would you prefer on your side, some pacifist with John Lennon's glasses on or the spiritual reincarnation of a god? Exactly.
Birdseye knew which side his bread was buttered, even if he was pretending his name was Andy in order to enjoy Nana Salopstick's sweet action.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:36:15 GMT
Don't get me started on the Dalai Lama, just ask serpico, he had a hand in 9/11 and the demise of Vera Duckworth. He's a sly one that Lama, never turn your back on him.....you risk getting caught by a left hook (or thunder as he calls it).
How did Lemar get his arse whupped by Ben Sheppard?
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:38:34 GMT
I enjoyed it.
Whilst Lemar minced about showing the lay-deez his big guns. Sheppard sorted him out big style. Shouldn't have put the nut in though, or introduced him to "Uncle Stanley". It was for charity for Fucks sake.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:40:25 GMT
Lemar had the guns but didn't have the ammo, Ben (or Sheppy as his mates call him) tore him a new one.
I thought it was a bit racist myself, it was all for charity though.
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:43:55 GMT
Sorted him out big style, mind you it's gone properly to his head, he was offering Wincey Willis out this morning, and Lorraine Kelly says she'll take the winner. She's a tornado of raw Scottish aggression she is.
Where will it end? Berkshire would be my guess.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:46:34 GMT
LK is a beast, in every sense of the word. I wouldn't get into a ring with her, I wouldn't mind getting in to one of her rings but that's another matter.
Men are just filth.
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:51:43 GMT
She's certainly tossed a few cabers in her time!!!!
As well as wanking some blokes off, or sucking their cocks. Basically what i am intimating towards is Lá Kelly's sexual promiscuity in order to induce amusement. I hope in this instant i have been successful.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:52:56 GMT
I think you failed.....
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 14:54:55 GMT
Humour isn't my strong point to be honest.
I'm shit hot at Macramé though, but who derives pleasure from admiring the individual stitchwork of a Man at the very top of his craft these days?
Nobody, that's who. A life's work and no-one to see it.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2008 14:56:38 GMT
I have no idea what Macramé is but I think it goes nice with chips Ringo. It's best cooked on a slow, simmering heat, cook it slowly for best results.
For Best Before date see cap.
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 15:00:42 GMT
"I don't know what Macramé is" - You insult me. Who wrote this then eh? 'twas you that involved in this darkest of arts in the first place.  |
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Post by mermaidsal on Mar 18, 2008 15:03:01 GMT
Macrame in tomato sauce on toast is lovely, but Captain Birdseye always used to worry me I must admit.
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 15:04:44 GMT
Sal,
You're thinking of Ravanelli. Heinz put it in tins.
And tomatoes. Technology gone mad if you ask me but i don't like to say anything.
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Post by mermaidsal on Mar 18, 2008 15:05:58 GMT
Call me old-fashioned, vestan, but I draw the line at white-haired pasta.  |
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Post by vestanpance on Mar 18, 2008 15:10:32 GMT
It's a taste sensation. It's you that's missing out.
I suppose that aubern merkin sorbets don't tickle your pickle either then?
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Post by mermaidsal on Mar 18, 2008 15:40:37 GMT
I think we should stop right here vestan, don't you?  |
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Post by Staffsoatcake on Mar 18, 2008 16:19:19 GMT
And all those kids he fingered.  |
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Post by armitagestokie on Mar 18, 2008 17:16:41 GMT
Looks just like 'Ziggar Zagger'
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