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Post by sovietonion on Jun 24, 2011 18:13:26 GMT
From none other than legendary 'Mad' Vlad Romanov, Comissar of Heart of Midlothian. It would seem that the club's recent shame of being exposed as having a convicted Paedophile player and two further squad members on Cocaine posession charges is down to their Agents. Also in this prologed ramble is 'King Meddler' Vlad himself having a go at interference on team selection. Just imagine the Club PR man reading this as it was almost certainly published without his knowledge:
Hearts statement
24.06.2011
The Hearts Board of Directors has issued the following statement in relation to outside influences on players and the club.
What's happening with the club today is not a new thing. For almost 7 years we have been fighting to shield the club from crooks, criminals and thieves. Many of the top players at the club have felt the bitter results of the swindles that have been carried out with them on their own skin. Skacel and Webster have returned to the club after realising where these 'football patriots' have led them.
"Over a short space of time 4 players at our club have been on the wrong end of the law. We note that 3 of them are represented by the same agent - Gary Mackay - who has been so vicious in his attacks against Mr Romanov.
"Taking into account the facts that have been omitted by the media it can be presumed that each of these cases is not a coincidence, but the result of targeted actions of a mafia that wants to manipulate the club and the results.
"Every year Hearts fights to be in the top 3, but even last season in the last 12 games of the season it was almost like someone replaced the team with a different one. Whose fault is that? Players? Manager's? Or it is mafia.
"Stealing players, bad games, problems with the law - all of that on top of record SFA fines. Problems are just shifted to another level.
"Mafia are dragging kids into the crime, in order to blackmail and profit on them. It is not possible to separate these people from pedophiles, and you don't need to do that. Each year we are forced to fight against these maniacs harder and harder. We are standing in their way not letting them manipulate the game of football in the way they want. As such they undermine us in every possible way they can.
"The task of the club is to tear these kids out of hands of criminals."" www.heartsfc.co.uk/articles/20110624/hearts-statement_2241384_2381659 |
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Post by FullerMagic on Jun 24, 2011 18:25:48 GMT
Well, it beats updates on relaying the pitch, I suppose  |
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Post by carplips on Jun 24, 2011 18:29:31 GMT
hahaha thats awesome imo!
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Post by MarkWolstanton on Jun 24, 2011 21:27:01 GMT
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Post by AlliG on Jun 24, 2011 21:36:25 GMT
I thought it would be impossible to out do the paranoia displayed by the great unwashed. Apparently not.  Mind you according to statistics out today Scotland has the highest per capita use of cocaine in the world. It appears that we now know where most of it is consumed. However, cocaine and deep fried Mars Bars seems to have a similar effect to bad LSD. |
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Post by StokieSC on Jun 24, 2011 21:40:23 GMT
And I thought the Old firm was complicated.
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Post by silverdalestokie on Jun 24, 2011 21:41:18 GMT
I blame Dave Kitson!!!  |
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Post by pea_tear_griffin on Jun 24, 2011 21:48:53 GMT
Is the Scottish Maffia the same as the "Red Mist"?
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Post by euanstokie123 on Jun 24, 2011 21:53:53 GMT
Is the Scottish Maffia the same as the "Red Mist"? ;D ;D |
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Post by s8to on Jun 24, 2011 21:56:31 GMT
Pullis out!!
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Post by march4 on Jun 24, 2011 21:57:35 GMT
#Everyone's a fruit and nut case# ;D
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Post by Olgrligm on Jun 24, 2011 22:03:06 GMT
That reads like the ramblings of a maniac who's locked himself away in his closet for 30 years, scrawling notes on pieces of parchment through a chink of light in the door. The men in white coats will be on their way soon.
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Post by multiplescoregasms on Jun 24, 2011 22:18:29 GMT
Crazy son 'bitches
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Post by mark71 on Jun 24, 2011 22:22:17 GMT
Wow, they must be on some seriously heavy shit!
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Post by Davef on Jun 25, 2011 9:18:27 GMT
It's just a shame Charles Machin's takeover bid for the Vale failed. We'd have had this kind of thing on a fortnightly basis.  |
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Post by Not_Nick_H on Jun 25, 2011 18:53:35 GMT
It's definitely written in that stilted, awkward English of someone who doesn't speak it as their native language.
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??? ;D
