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Post by ted1965 on Mar 6, 2008 12:35:52 GMT
I was reading the board and I feel totally left out in the dark as I suddenly realized I know nobody or nothing about the club.
I am not related to the girl who sniffs the leather on Ricardo’s boots each morning, don’t have any access to Peter Coates dry cleaner, his wife’s hairdresser. I have never bumped into John Rudge at the garden centre, or had carnal knowledge of the tea lady while she divulged next seasons transfer targets to me.
I am not even part of Ian’s barber shop syndicate. I feel totally inadequate now, it’s all I can do to sit by my hotline to TP and wait for him to call with our latest targets name.
I was hopeful I might be able to find out something about in coming players from TP’s third cousin twice removed Pulis the sheepherder but sadly they locked him up before he could tell me what he knew.
So sadly I am sat here listening to the voices in my head, though I haven’t listened to them since they told me we were signing a world class striker and it turned out to be Vince. So I no longer listen to their mumbled delusions about some rock the city singing.
I just wanted to share with you all my complete lack of knowledge inside or otherwise and I hope people will take it a truthful and honest piece of information given to you with the best of intent.
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Post by knowles on Mar 6, 2008 12:37:57 GMT
;D
Nice one Ted
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Post by Adster on Mar 6, 2008 12:38:34 GMT
ted thanks for making me laugh today ;D another quality post from the TED Master  |
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Post by luke45 on Mar 6, 2008 12:39:21 GMT
;D
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Post by wakefieldstokie on Mar 6, 2008 12:39:59 GMT
:oHere here. I too know f all about incoming signings.
Apart from Nugent who is in the club shop buying a SCFC mug following his signing this morning ;D
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Post by Do it for bringbackthevic on Mar 6, 2008 12:41:00 GMT
;D Top Bombing Ted.
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Post by sheikhmomo on Mar 6, 2008 12:42:33 GMT
I I have never bumped into John Rudge at the garden centre You want to try the golf course Ted. 9-5 Monday to Friday! |
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Post by garyhackett on Mar 6, 2008 12:44:23 GMT
;D ;D ;D
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eccystokey
Academy Starlet
Look at the tits on this!
Posts: 211
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Post by eccystokey on Mar 6, 2008 12:50:49 GMT
You don't have to worry Ted, there aren't any incoming signings!!!
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Post by y_oh_y_delilah on Mar 6, 2008 13:41:23 GMT
I've got no insider knowledge either Ted, like you I have to rely on Gary Hackett for any snippets of transfer information.  I could try and find out where Ian gets his hair cut though, at least that would be a small step in the right direction. ;D |
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Post by lordb on Mar 6, 2008 13:49:48 GMT
Ian is (almost) bald so I suspect the barber thing is one of his gags.
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Post by y_oh_y_delilah on Mar 6, 2008 13:56:53 GMT
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Post by ted1965 on Mar 6, 2008 13:59:41 GMT
well maybe he pops in for a polish on a thursday, pledge-ing his love for the club.
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Post by rorymscfc on Mar 6, 2008 13:59:44 GMT
Ted, I share your frustration and sense of inadequacy! Like you, I have no connections within Stoke City FC and what's worse, because I live in Bristol and work all week, I don't even have the opportunity to loiter around the Britannia spotting potential new signings.
I don't think even a heavy dose of viagra could cure this feeling of complete impotence!
RoryM
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Post by rorymscfc on Mar 6, 2008 14:01:01 GMT
Ian is (almost) bald so I suspect the barber thing is one of his gags. He doesn't wear a baseball cap to keep his pate warm perchance??? RoryM |
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Post by ted1965 on Mar 6, 2008 14:03:25 GMT
I think the club are missing a trick here, with all those people in the shadows outside the Brit waiting for the next signing to appear with his agent and John Rudge pulling his golf bag, though I do they're only good friends and not playing pitch and putt in the sand traps.
It's time to market the club grubby mac, can be worn with the club trilby and shades so you can look furtive but loyal at the same time, can aslo be worn on Cannock chase when trying to find information from Stan Collymore.
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Post by CalgaryPotter on Mar 6, 2008 15:20:56 GMT
Hi, my name is Calgary Potter and I too am an 'inadequate' I've been a member of IA now for the last 6 years although I did fall off the wagon in December 2006 when I had an inside source at the Sentivale. The same could happen next in a couple of weeks as I plan to visit the Cherry Tree, word has it that players eat there  |
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Post by garyhackett on Mar 6, 2008 15:41:32 GMT
I hear bus stops are a particularly good source of information - Dont forget the day Potterfan saw Sammy Bangoura at the bus stop in Tunstall the same day he was playing for Guinea in France
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Post by frasier37 on Mar 6, 2008 16:22:26 GMT
Nice one Ted.
Unusually short for one of your posts but, another good one none the less. ;D
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Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2008 16:23:24 GMT
Can I join? I don't know anyone or anything either.
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Post by meladben on Mar 6, 2008 20:58:04 GMT
Ted ,i haven't got a very good voice but I'll help you with your quest to rock the city with your singing ;D we could ask Cher or Tina Turner to come along....they've done nowt for a while  |
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Post by mermaidsal on Mar 6, 2008 21:01:33 GMT
;D ;D as ever.
Anyone else think what the Sentinel's missing is a weekly dose of ted??
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