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Post by 606Stokie on Jun 25, 2008 11:57:51 GMT
is a pain in the arse but it has to be done ;d
As i cant find the other one...
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Post by vestanpance on Jun 25, 2008 12:04:56 GMT
I love reading CV's
"Socialising with friends" - Getting absolutely fucking trousered ona firiday night
"Outgoing" - Slut
"Enjoy Cinema" - I go once in a fucking blue moon but i couldn't put drinking as a hobby
"Dedicated" - As soon as i get this job i'll start looking for another one. On your time
"Hard Working" - Too fucking sly to get caught fucking around
and my personal favourite
"Work well either individually or as part of a team" - Nobody will come near me after a month due to my fucking monumental body odour.
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Post by Butters on Jun 25, 2008 12:08:15 GMT
I love reading CV's "Socialising with friends" - Getting absolutely fucking trousered ona firiday night "Outgoing" - Slut "Enjoy Cinema" - I go once in a fucking blue moon but i couldn't put drinking as a hobby "Dedicated" - As soon as i get this job i'll start looking for another one. On your time "Hard Working" - Too fucking sly to get caught fucking around and my personal favourite "Work well either individually or as part of a team" - Nobody will come near me after a month due to my fucking monumental body odour. ;D |
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Post by Deleted on Jun 25, 2008 12:08:25 GMT
"Hobbies - Reading" - I'm a liar
"I am a proactive individual" - I'm a bullshitting liar
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Post by vestanpance on Jun 25, 2008 12:12:19 GMT
"I respond well to pressure" - Give me a deadline and i'll be on the sick quicker than you can say "John Leslie's latest victim"
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Post by 606Stokie on Jun 25, 2008 12:14:08 GMT
I love reading CV's "Socialising with friends" - Getting absolutely fucking trousered ona firiday night "Outgoing" - Slut "Enjoy Cinema" - I go once in a fucking blue moon but i couldn't put drinking as a hobby "Dedicated" - As soon as i get this job i'll start looking for another one. On your time "Hard Working" - Too fucking sly to get caught fucking around and my personal favourite "Work well either individually or as part of a team" - Nobody will come near me after a month due to my fucking monumental body odour. PSML!!!! Exalt for that one ;d |
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Post by Chunky Lover! on Jun 25, 2008 12:14:48 GMT
Karma for that Vestan
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Post by scfcmatt on Jun 25, 2008 12:14:53 GMT
I.T. Skills usually means ''I'll sit on the oaty all day''
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Post by Deleted on Jun 25, 2008 12:15:26 GMT
“I increased profitability in my department by 23% whilst also cutting overheads by 12.3%” – I’m a cuunt.
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Post by vestanpance on Jun 25, 2008 12:20:02 GMT
The greatest line, and one that i have heard many times is the following:
"What would you say is your biggest weakness?"
"If anything, I work too hard"
Anyone who says that should be punched in the face, along with "I'm too hard on myself" or "I set my own standards too high"
When asked your weaknesses, tell your prospective employer that you drink too much, you always owe the bookie and occassionally you have to give the Mrs a slap if she runs her mouth. You may not get the job, but you will be remembered.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 25, 2008 12:25:04 GMT
“Under weaknesses you’ve put eczema”
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