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Post by Billy the kid on Jan 5, 2019 18:21:04 GMT
So i popped the question before christmas, and we are in full swing on wedding planning, but why is it that the mother in law can reduce my mrs to tears and say she isn't coming because she wants a church wedding? Personally I feel that if I am spending the best part of 15 grand on a wedding I will get married where the fuck i want. Anyone else run in to this?
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Post by felonious on Jan 5, 2019 18:37:04 GMT
So i popped the question before christmas, and we are in full swing on wedding planning, but why is it that the mother in law can reduce my mrs to tears and say she isn't coming because she wants a church wedding? Personally I feel that if I am spending the best part of 15 grand on a wedding I will get married where the fuck i want. Anyone else run in to this? Unfortunately the only thing you can do is face up to the monster sooner rather than later. Interference from a control freak, who the actual fuck is getting married?
I had a few words with my ex over Christmas and had to explain to her that whilst I agreed that the daughter's boyfriend's mother was being difficult there were actually two mothers who were being difficult. Didn't go down to well mind you but the daughter is an adult now and has every right to her own life and how she wants to live it. I would say that the same goes for you and your future missus.
....and by the way, congratulations
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Post by swampmongrel on Jan 5, 2019 18:43:03 GMT
There’s something about mothers and weddings.
My MIL is otherwise perfectly reasonable but she was a nightmare around our wedding. Organizing stuff behind our backs that we didn’t actually want.
Ignore the emotional blackmail and stick to your guns and do what you your future wife want. There’s no way on earth she won’t attend.
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Post by chuffedstokie on Jan 5, 2019 19:03:30 GMT
To quote Fleetwood Mac "go your own way". I got lucky with the MIL she was a great support. My own mum on the other hand tried to turn our wedding day into her own party. Dressing up as Madonna wasn't one of her best ideas. Congratulations and have a great day.
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Post by salopstick on Jan 5, 2019 19:09:53 GMT
My father in law gave me £7k towards the wedding. The guest list consisted of 50 people we had to invite before we got round to friends we asked him could we use the deposit on a house. He was happier with that
I saved up in Iraq a few years back for a nice holiday to Cyprus on my return. We ended up throwing another £1000 at it and got married out there. We said those who want to come sort it out themselves
22 people came out and we had a great time at the fraction of the cost.
As far as inlaws go my MIL is ok. My dad died 12 years ago and my FIL has been awesome to me
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Post by potterinleeds on Jan 5, 2019 19:19:23 GMT
To quote Fleetwood Mac "go your own way". I got lucky with the MIL she was a great support. My own mum on the other hand tried to turn our wedding day into her own party. Dressing up as Madonna wasn't one of her best ideas. Congratulations and have a great day. Just out of interest Chuffed, which incarnation of Madonna was it - her Material Girl, Vogue or Like a Prayer phases, or something different?
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Post by Billybigbollox on Jan 5, 2019 19:27:03 GMT
So i popped the question before christmas, and we are in full swing on wedding planning, but why is it that the mother in law can reduce my mrs to tears and say she isn't coming because she wants a church wedding? Personally I feel that if I am spending the best part of 15 grand on a wedding I will get married where the fuck i want. Anyone else run in to this? It’s the only thing that’s stopping me from being a bigamist. One Mother in law is enough for any fucker. Good luck with the wedding btw.
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Post by felonious on Jan 5, 2019 19:32:04 GMT
To quote Fleetwood Mac "go your own way". I got lucky with the MIL she was a great support. My own mum on the other hand tried to turn our wedding day into her own party. Dressing up as Madonna wasn't one of her best ideas. Congratulations and have a great day. Just out of interest Chuffed, which incarnation of Madonna was it - her Material Girl, Vogue or Like a Prayer phases, or something different? You've missed the Like a virgin phase
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Post by murphthesurf on Jan 5, 2019 19:32:38 GMT
To quote Fleetwood Mac "go your own way". I got lucky with the MIL she was a great support. My own mum on the other hand tried to turn our wedding day into her own party. Dressing up as Madonna wasn't one of her best ideas. Congratulations and have a great day. Just out of interest Chuffed, which incarnation of Madonna was it - her Material Girl, Vogue or Like a Prayer phases, or something different? EXACTLY.........Ie. Please tell us she wasn't wearing the pointy JPGaultier you-know-what and pole-dancing all round the place?????
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Post by murphthesurf on Jan 5, 2019 19:35:23 GMT
There’s something about mothers and weddings. My MIL is otherwise perfectly reasonable but she was a nightmare around our wedding. Organizing stuff behind our backs that we didn’t actually want. Ignore the emotional blackmail and stick to your guns and do what you your future wife want. There’s no way on earth she won’t attend. THIS !
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Post by murphthesurf on Jan 5, 2019 19:41:10 GMT
To quote Fleetwood Mac "go your own way". I got lucky with the MIL she was a great support. My own mum on the other hand tried to turn our wedding day into her own party. Dressing up as Madonna wasn't one of her best ideas. Congratulations and have a great day. See, Billy - we all agree! It will be YOUR day, both of you, and no-one else's....... So you two, and no-one else, should decide! Congrats and good luck!
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Post by felonious on Jan 5, 2019 20:06:10 GMT
To quote Fleetwood Mac "go your own way". I got lucky with the MIL she was a great support. My own mum on the other hand tried to turn our wedding day into her own party. Dressing up as Madonna wasn't one of her best ideas. Congratulations and have a great day. See, Billy - we all agree! It will be YOUR day, both of you, and no-one else's....... So you two, and no-one else, should decide! Congrats and good luck! Good God woman, men and women agreeing on something, whatever next?
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Post by potterinleeds on Jan 5, 2019 20:08:57 GMT
Just out of interest Chuffed, which incarnation of Madonna was it - her Material Girl, Vogue or Like a Prayer phases, or something different? EXACTLY.........Ie. Please tell us she wasn't wearing the pointy JPGaultier you-know-what and pole-dancing all round the place????? That awful thought did cross my mind too but I'm far too much of a gentleman to mention it directly.
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Post by chuffedstokie on Jan 5, 2019 20:11:02 GMT
To quote Fleetwood Mac "go your own way". I got lucky with the MIL she was a great support. My own mum on the other hand tried to turn our wedding day into her own party. Dressing up as Madonna wasn't one of her best ideas. Congratulations and have a great day. Just out of interest Chuffed, which incarnation of Madonna was it - her Material Girl, Vogue or Like a Prayer phases, or something different? It was some sort of low cut basque arrangement, this was 1990 so where she got the idea from is anybody's guess, my mates thought it was great but then they were mostly watching Italia 90 on a discreted mini t.v. under the bar in the marquee / tent thing we'd got. She carried on regardless though. Pictures probably exist somewhere but I really don't want to be reminded.
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Post by murphthesurf on Jan 5, 2019 20:11:59 GMT
See, Billy - we all agree! It will be YOUR day, both of you, and no-one else's....... So you two, and no-one else, should decide! Congrats and good luck! Good God woman, men and women agreeing on something, whatever next? NAUGHTY STEP, NAUGHTY STEP......... 5........ 4....... 3........ 2..................................
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Post by chuffedstokie on Jan 5, 2019 20:13:41 GMT
Just out of interest Chuffed, which incarnation of Madonna was it - her Material Girl, Vogue or Like a Prayer phases, or something different? EXACTLY.........Ie. Please tell us she wasn't wearing the pointy JPGaultier you-know-what and pole-dancing all round the place????? Definitely not that thank god!.
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Post by chuffedstokie on Jan 5, 2019 20:24:04 GMT
Just out of interest Chuffed, which incarnation of Madonna was it - her Material Girl, Vogue or Like a Prayer phases, or something different? You've missed the Like a virgin phase I've just looked it up felonious it was the 'like a virgin' outfit. I think I'm going to be ill. 🤮
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Post by felonious on Jan 5, 2019 20:26:52 GMT
You've missed the Like a virgin phase I've just looked it up felonious it was the 'like a virgin' outfit. I think I'm going to be ill. 🤮 I'm sure it looked shiny and new.
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Post by chuffedstokie on Jan 5, 2019 20:28:02 GMT
I've just looked it up felonious it was the 'like a virgin' outfit. I think I'm going to be ill. 🤮 I'm sure it looked shiny and new. It bloody didn't!.
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Post by felonious on Jan 5, 2019 20:29:56 GMT
Back on subject I had the very worst example of a mother in law. Even the dog used to throw up at the bottom of the drive before going in. The missus used to say it was because he got car sickness but sometimes we were both throwing up
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Post by felonious on Jan 5, 2019 21:19:49 GMT
Good God woman, men and women agreeing on something, whatever next? NAUGHTY RAMP, NAUGHTY RAMP......... 5........ 4....... 3........ 2..................................
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Post by bathstoke on Jan 6, 2019 10:04:12 GMT
I'm sure it looked shiny and new. It bloody didn't!. I know mothers can be mad, but yours sounds bonkers!
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Post by chuffedstokie on Jan 6, 2019 10:19:08 GMT
I know mothers can be mad, but yours sounds bonkers! She's calmed down since then but still has her moments.
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Post by lawrieleslie on Jan 6, 2019 11:02:05 GMT
My mother in law was the most divisive person I have ever known. She spent most of her life upsetting and turning one of her three children against each other one way or another. She also did the same with her grand children which was despicable and horrible. The final straw came when she popped her clogs and she had written my Mrs and her elder brother out of the estate which was in the region of £350k, leaving it all to the younger brother who refused flatly to split any of it. It has completely divided the siblings and seems from the outside to be the final act of vengeance from a very twisted woman.
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Post by Staffsoatcake on Jan 6, 2019 21:58:41 GMT
My mates MIl Is an Angel. Lucky sod,mine is still living.
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Post by metalhead on Jan 6, 2019 23:51:33 GMT
There's always hostility against the mother in law.
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Post by Northy on Jan 7, 2019 8:53:18 GMT
My mother in law was the most divisive person I have ever known. She spent most of her life upsetting and turning one of her three children against each other one way or another. She also did the same with her grand children which was despicable and horrible. The final straw came when she popped her clogs and she had written my Mrs and her elder brother out of the estate which was in the region of £350k, leaving it all to the younger brother who refused flatly to split any of it. It has completely divided the siblings and seems from the outside to be the final act of vengeance from a very twisted woman. As the saying goes, you can choose friends but you cant choose family I take it you have nothing to do with him anymore?
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Post by Northy on Jan 7, 2019 8:55:35 GMT
So i popped the question before christmas, and we are in full swing on wedding planning, but why is it that the mother in law can reduce my mrs to tears and say she isn't coming because she wants a church wedding? Personally I feel that if I am spending the best part of 15 grand on a wedding I will get married where the fuck i want. Anyone else run in to this? Tell her her daughter isn't a virgin anymore and can't wear white, that'll bring her round to your side Just tell her it's what her daughter want's as a grown adult, and if MIL doesn't like it then tough, but maybe speak to the FIL first to try and get him to tell the MIL.
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Post by flea79 on Jan 7, 2019 9:06:23 GMT
me and the current mrs flea79 did fine with both of our mothers who let us do our own thing, my mother and i had a disagreement over family invitations about who to invite and not too, i won in the end
sadly my ladies mother never made our wedding....
but its your day, your wedding, your life, perhaps a reminder would help
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Post by lawrieleslie on Jan 7, 2019 9:37:48 GMT
My mother in law was the most divisive person I have ever known. She spent most of her life upsetting and turning one of her three children against each other one way or another. She also did the same with her grand children which was despicable and horrible. The final straw came when she popped her clogs and she had written my Mrs and her elder brother out of the estate which was in the region of £350k, leaving it all to the younger brother who refused flatly to split any of it. It has completely divided the siblings and seems from the outside to be the final act of vengeance from a very twisted woman. As the saying goes, you can choose friends but you cant choose family I take it you have nothing to do with him anymore? Tbh I didn’t really get on with him before this happened 3 years ago. It’s my Mrs and her elder brother I feel sorry for being betrayed first by their own mother then by their brother who could have righted some of the wrong. They did seek legal advice but unless you can prove that she wasn’t of sound mind, or was coerced into making the will, or the Will was fraudulent/not the latest will or they were dependent on their mother then there is no chance of successfully contesting it. However I’m a believer in every dog having its day and all that when her brother bought a brand new Lexus 4WD thing and it was stolen within a week never to be seen again. Karma.
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