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Post by Pedropotter on May 10, 2012 11:28:52 GMT
Would anyone actually mind if I shot her in the head?
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Post by frasier99 on May 10, 2012 11:37:46 GMT
i've always wondered if her farts smell eggy
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Post by Staffsoatcake on May 10, 2012 11:41:10 GMT
The only thing I wouldn't shoot into her, is me load. ;D
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Post by ichabodcheesecake on May 10, 2012 13:42:33 GMT
She is a monster. I remember her once on a travel show in a jacuzzi and she seemed to think she was attractive in some way by making suggestions that male viewers would want to join her !!!! It was only one of those jacuzzis for 4 people so no chance of anyone else fitting in the thing with her anyway.
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Post by Gods on May 10, 2012 13:57:59 GMT
Over to you Mr Sausage?!
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Post by Yorkshirepotter on May 10, 2012 14:40:16 GMT
Hes too busy wanking himself into a frezy over a three way with Feltz and Dawn French. On the origional question, go for it. Shes a fucking horrible munter. |
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Post by elystokie on May 10, 2012 15:09:47 GMT
Feel free, it's bad enough driving to work at 0530 without having to listen to her, I've given the show she does a few listens but have given up and defected to 606 now.
The nutter that did that show a couple of years ago was better than Feltz, and she was pretty bad.
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Post by oldgit57 on May 10, 2012 21:18:50 GMT
One of my favourite quotes was Warren Mitchell about the Feltz creature. " Say what you like, she has a big heart ........ mind you she'd need one to pump blood around that lot! "
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Post by mistersausage on May 11, 2012 12:57:47 GMT
You mean Vanessa (I'm a size 10) Feltz? I bet her clitoris is a size ten alone the fat cunt. She's so fucking ugly that even her name is ugly. She's a fat sweaty swollen faced pig whose fanny probably looks like a half eaten kebab that has been in the gutter for a week with its contents spilling out and its mayo stinking to high heaven with flies even giving it a miss. Her arse must look like an unmade bed covered in sweat and arse oil with chunks of shit paper still stuck to it. She's utterly fucking repulsive in every way in which it is possible to be, from her moon like face which is in a permanent sneer (probably wind) to her vile six figered pig titted swamp mongers hands that have abused food for their whole life when not shoved up her twatbox. She has the body of a decaying whale, and when she waddles along her flab moves in a hundred different directions at once, flinging off chunks of crease cheese. I bet if she was hung from scaffolding by her hands various items, lost in the mists of trash eating whilst watching shite TV or trawling the media for mention of her name, would fall from the hidden recesses and orifices of her morbildy obese blubber mountain .... A wide variety which may or may not include tv remotes, mobile phones (even those massive ones from the 80's - INCLUDING CHARGERS), huge black dildo's, rolled up magazines stinking of stale fanny kippers, assorted phallus shaped vegetables, wine bottles, the odd TV set, long lost clothing and cushions, and the odd friend who went missing in years gone by. The one thing that amazes me is how she manages to eat at all as any time I've seen her on TV or heard her on the radio she just NEVER FUCKING SHUTS UP, she constantly butts in and talks over the top of people, so she even hogs conversations ..... In short she's an utter pig and I'd pay to watch her slowly rendered down for fat whilst her eyeballs were sucked out with a hoover and her tongue dissolved in an acid bath. She's even in this old advert for fucks sake  |
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Post by Yorkshirepotter on May 11, 2012 17:56:35 GMT
You mean Vanessa (I'm a size 10) Feltz? I bet her clitoris is a size ten alone the fat cunt. She's so fucking ugly that even her name is ugly. She's a fat sweaty swollen faced pig whose fanny probably looks like a half eaten kebab that has been in the gutter for a week with its contents spilling out and its mayo stinking to high heaven with flies even giving it a miss. Her arse must look like an unmade bed covered in sweat and arse oil with chunks of shit paper still stuck to it. She's utterly fucking repulsive in every way in which it is possible to be, from her moon like face which is in a permanent sneer (probably wind) to her vile six figered pig titted swamp mongers hands that have abused food for their whole life when not shoved up her twatbox. She has the body of a decaying whale, and when she waddles along her flab moves in a hundred different directions at once, flinging off chunks of crease cheese. I bet if she was hung from scaffolding by her hands various items, lost in the mists of trash eating whilst watching shite TV or trawling the media for mention of her name, would fall from the hidden recesses and orifices of her morbildy obese blubber mountain .... A wide variety which may or may not include tv remotes, mobile phones (even those massive ones from the 80's - INCLUDING CHARGERS), huge black dildo's, rolled up magazines stinking of stale fanny kippers, assorted phallus shaped vegetables, wine bottles, the odd TV set, long lost clothing and cushions, and the odd friend who went missing in years gone by. The one thing that amazes me is how she manages to eat at all as any time I've seen her on TV or heard her on the radio she just NEVER FUCKING SHUTS UP, she constantly butts in and talks over the top of people, so she even hogs conversations ..... In short she's an utter pig and I'd pay to watch her slowly rendered down for fat whilst her eyeballs were sucked out with a hoover and her tongue dissolved in an acid bath. She's even in this old advert for fucks sake Yeah, but would you fuck it/her? :0) |
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Post by mistersausage on May 11, 2012 19:52:17 GMT
You mean Vanessa (I'm a size 10) Feltz? I bet her clitoris is a size ten alone the fat cunt. She's so fucking ugly that even her name is ugly. She's a fat sweaty swollen faced pig whose fanny probably looks like a half eaten kebab that has been in the gutter for a week with its contents spilling out and its mayo stinking to high heaven with flies even giving it a miss. Her arse must look like an unmade bed covered in sweat and arse oil with chunks of shit paper still stuck to it. She's utterly fucking repulsive in every way in which it is possible to be, from her moon like face which is in a permanent sneer (probably wind) to her vile six figered pig titted swamp mongers hands that have abused food for their whole life when not shoved up her twatbox. She has the body of a decaying whale, and when she waddles along her flab moves in a hundred different directions at once, flinging off chunks of crease cheese. I bet if she was hung from scaffolding by her hands various items, lost in the mists of trash eating whilst watching shite TV or trawling the media for mention of her name, would fall from the hidden recesses and orifices of her morbildy obese blubber mountain .... A wide variety which may or may not include tv remotes, mobile phones (even those massive ones from the 80's - INCLUDING CHARGERS), huge black dildo's, rolled up magazines stinking of stale fanny kippers, assorted phallus shaped vegetables, wine bottles, the odd TV set, long lost clothing and cushions, and the odd friend who went missing in years gone by. The one thing that amazes me is how she manages to eat at all as any time I've seen her on TV or heard her on the radio she just NEVER FUCKING SHUTS UP, she constantly butts in and talks over the top of people, so she even hogs conversations ..... In short she's an utter pig and I'd pay to watch her slowly rendered down for fat whilst her eyeballs were sucked out with a hoover and her tongue dissolved in an acid bath. She's even in this old advert for fucks sake Yeah, but would you fuck it/her? :0) I'd rather hammer my helmet with a ball pein hammer mate  |
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Post by Caerwrangonpotter on May 12, 2012 5:49:35 GMT
Get your feelings off your chest Sausage! LOL
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Post by chopandmash on May 12, 2012 7:54:09 GMT
fucking genius
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Post by Gods on May 12, 2012 21:20:06 GMT
Well worth the wait for Mr Sausage contribution ;D
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Post by Pedropotter on May 14, 2012 11:09:38 GMT
Right, thanks, now, wheres my revolver?
;D
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Post by JurgenVandeurzen on May 14, 2012 12:59:58 GMT
 Cum an gerrit stokies!! |
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'I knew a woman once but she died soon afterwards'
