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Post by felonious on Apr 2, 2020 7:12:50 GMT
We can do caught by the Fuzz if anyone would like to own up. Never been breathalysed and I can only remember being stopped in a car once trying to navigate unfathomable roadworks in Sheffield about 30 years back. I was stopped by the police in younger days at 3ish in the morning walking back from a drunken night out in Newcastle. Asked and got a lift back home  Favourite one has to be the journey back into town from the Hadjuk Split match in the back of the Croation version of a Black Mariah with the lad then about 13/14 years of age. The three policemen in the front of the cab were pointing out places of interest and then some local song came on the radio and we were serenaded.... surreal  Another one of those "Don't say a word to your mum" moments  |
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Post by LL Cool Dave on Apr 2, 2020 7:27:42 GMT
My dad got stopped on the A500 the other day on his way back home from Wales, they were checking where he was going due the corona virus.
Only been stopped once myself, just over the border after Gretna, the night of the Scottish referendum. The coppers were doing 50 on the motorway, so I rightly overtook them. For some reason they took offence at this and pulled me over. Saw the kids asleep in the back and sent us on our way.
Very odd.
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Post by Northy on Apr 2, 2020 8:02:05 GMT
A few
Going up the D road after a Stoke match in the mid 80's, 7 of us in a ford fiesta (2 in the boot) the cops face when we all got out
M74 2 lane stretch for speeding, radar trap, I'd moved over and let a white Mercedes go flying past, cops came down the slip road about half a mile away and pulled me over, said there wasn't a white Mercedes and gave me the ticket, jock bastards.
M6 North near Stafford, some bloke pulled out in front of me quite close, I braked flashed the lights at them, the car behind me was an unmarked police car, pulled me over and told me to not be aggressive, I'm exasperated about the other guy pulling out and the cop said 'you should anticipate things like that'
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Post by The Drunken Communist on Apr 2, 2020 8:17:39 GMT
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Post by wagsastokie on Apr 2, 2020 8:45:41 GMT
Got stopped five times in one week suspected of drink driving
The first occasion on the Monday I had been in my local playing dominoes with my mate the landlord drinking coffee
I came out got in the car to go a pick the boys up from school and around a quarter of a mile up the road the police blue lighted pulled me over
I asked if I had done anything wrong they replied no but its been reported you have been drinking you've been in the pub over two hours
They then asked me to blow into the device which showed all green
The officer turned round and said to me sir we have reason to believe the device is faulty will you please blow in to this other device which he fetched from one of the other two cars which had since turned up
All green lights again with a grunted thank you I was told I was clear so I asked how did you know I was in the pub over two hours
Oh we have sat here waiting for you to Come out
I then made the error of pointing out that it didn't seem the best possible use of police time
And just because they go into to a bakers I don't suspect they eat all the doughnuts
Three days on the trot that bastard stopped me
On the fifth occasion in was a young lad and I'd really had enough by then and threatened to report them for harassment he appolgised and said my name had been on the stop at sight list and promised to remove it
Never been stopped in the last eighteen years
The bit that made me smile in the end was that it was during the middle of lent I have never had a drink in lent for over forty years
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Post by mattador78 on Apr 2, 2020 9:08:14 GMT
Stopped once on the way home from a night match in the relegation from the prem season. Was around the corner from my house driving up a bank went to change gear started coughing as I had a cold and slipped into fourth instead of second. Proper jolted the car then had to piss through the gears to get going again. Got to the top of the bank and turned into my street to get the blue lights in my mirror and pulled over. Opened the door to the copper snot and tears running down my face as I started retching and coughing like mad. He asked me what happed so I told him, said I’d just come back from the match and if he wanted he could breathalyse me but make it quick as I only lived two doors down stoke had lost and I’d got get up at five go work. This was before Covid and even then I don’t think he want come near me with what I’d got so he just said your alright get bed lol.
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Post by potterinleeds on Apr 2, 2020 9:22:20 GMT
A few years ago, I got stopped by the police a couple of times over a short period when out running at night, as apparently I fitted the description of a burglar in the local area of Leeds where I live.
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Post by felonious on Apr 2, 2020 9:54:06 GMT
A few years ago, I got stopped by the police a couple of times over a short period when out running at night, as apparently I fitted the description of a burglar in the local area of Leeds where I live. Figure, I thought about walking on when we met up  |
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Post by bathstoke on Apr 2, 2020 10:45:40 GMT
& lets not forget Trump’s version, “Grabbed by the Fuzz!” |
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Post by chuffedstokie on Apr 2, 2020 11:35:00 GMT
On the way back from a hockey match years ago I was driver and we'd stopped at several pubs on the way home. I was dropping my mates off and after the first had fallen out of the car at his gate pretty pissed we set off. Before arriving at no2 address I was pulled. My remaining 2 mates were asleep in the back. Got out of the Triumph Herald which had my L plates on and explained what was going on at which stage the officer explained that the qualified driver who was asleep needed to be in the front seat alongside me. He was woken up and strapped into the passenger seat. We apologised profusely and were allowed to carry on at which point my mate fell unconscious again. We didn't mention the fact that I was coming to the end of my spell in the Met Police cadets and my other friend was a Met officer as well. Should have known better I suppose.
We were stopped 2 weeks later by the same pair in almost the same spot,the guy said "oh not you lot again " and just waved us off. I blame the L plates.
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Post by NassauDave on Apr 2, 2020 11:48:47 GMT
A few years ago, I got stopped by the police a couple of times over a short period when out running at night, as apparently I fitted the description of a burglar in the local area of Leeds where I live. The laptop under your arm was. a bit of a giveaway too.... |
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Post by elystokie on Apr 2, 2020 14:00:01 GMT
On a journey back darn sarf one Sunday evening as I was passing the Oxford area I needed to pee so pulled into a 'services' (it was basically an extended petrol station). I noticed when I went in that you could buy a pastie and heat it up in a microwave, quite a new concept at the time for these places. So I thought I'd be clever and have a pastie heat up in the microwave whilst I used the facilities. I was about 15 miles down the road and just finishing the last of it when I realised I'd just walked out of the toilet, picked up the pastie from the microwave and walked out without paying for it  At that time the Newbury bypass hadn't yet been built and you could pretty much guarantee a jam of at least half an hour there regardless of when you went through, I spent the whole time worrying about my 'stolen' pastie. At the very end of the jam I was just going over the last roundabout when blue lights started flashing in my rear view mirror, I pulled into a bus stop to let them pass and they pulled in behind me! It seemed my worst fears were about to be confirmed. I got out of the car ready to confess and offer to pay when one of the coppers asked me if I knew one of my brake lights wasn't working |
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Post by Mr_DaftBurger on Apr 2, 2020 14:12:06 GMT
I asked a lady of the night if she'd ever been picked up by the fuzz! She said no, but she had been swung round by her tits a few times!  |
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Post by jimmygscfc1234 on Apr 2, 2020 14:22:01 GMT
A few Going up the D road after a Stoke match in the mid 80's, 7 of us in a ford fiesta (2 in the boot) the cops face when we all got out M74 2 lane stretch for speeding, radar trap, I'd moved over and let a white Mercedes go flying past, cops came down the slip road about half a mile away and pulled me over, said there wasn't a white Mercedes and gave me the ticket, jock bastards. M6 North near Stafford, some bloke pulled out in front of me quite close, I braked flashed the lights at them, the car behind me was an unmarked police car, pulled me over and told me to not be aggressive, I'm exasperated about the other guy pulling out and the cop said 'you should anticipate things like that' Well Northy, the first incident was you and your mates breaking the law. Why did you get a ticket from the police for the second incident and would they have been Irish bastards, Welsh bastards or English bastards if it had happened in these respective countries? And with the third incident, it sounds like you were genuinely hard done by. |
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Post by Northy on Apr 2, 2020 17:20:35 GMT
A few Going up the D road after a Stoke match in the mid 80's, 7 of us in a ford fiesta (2 in the boot) the cops face when we all got out M74 2 lane stretch for speeding, radar trap, I'd moved over and let a white Mercedes go flying past, cops came down the slip road about half a mile away and pulled me over, said there wasn't a white Mercedes and gave me the ticket, jock bastards. M6 North near Stafford, some bloke pulled out in front of me quite close, I braked flashed the lights at them, the car behind me was an unmarked police car, pulled me over and told me to not be aggressive, I'm exasperated about the other guy pulling out and the cop said 'you should anticipate things like that' Well Northy, the first incident was you and your mates breaking the law. Why did you get a ticket from the police for the second incident and would they have been Irish bastards, Welsh bastards or English bastards if it had happened in these respective countries? And with the third incident, it sounds like you were genuinely hard done by. it wasn't the law back in the 80's though to wear a seatbelt there were 2 in the car in Scotland, it was the law back then, nah it's just jocks |
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Post by Dutchpeter on Apr 2, 2020 17:57:05 GMT
Stopped 50 plus times by the Police, MOD Police, Royal Naval Police. Once was stopped by the old bill in Plymouth coming out of a second hand book shop on the Barbican. They thought I was a football hooligan. My RN ID card usually placated the civvie old bill, and I think I’ve only turned out my pockets two or three times. My sis suggested I grew my hair and stopped having skinhead cuts, lo and behold nothing doing now.
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Post by Northy on Apr 2, 2020 18:09:34 GMT
Stopped 50 plus times by the Police, MOD Police, Royal Naval Police. Once was stopped by the old bill in Plymouth coming out of a second hand book shop on the Barbican. They thought I was a football hooligan. My RN ID card usually placated the civvie old bill, and I think I’ve only turned out my pockets two or three times. My sis suggested I grew my hair and stopped having skinhead cuts, lo and behold nothing doing now. Oh yeh, I'd forgotten about MOD plod, been stopped a few times by that lot |
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Post by elystokie on Apr 2, 2020 18:25:17 GMT
Stopped 50 plus times by the Police, MOD Police, Royal Naval Police. Once was stopped by the old bill in Plymouth coming out of a second hand book shop on the Barbican. They thought I was a football hooligan. My RN ID card usually placated the civvie old bill, and I think I’ve only turned out my pockets two or three times. My sis suggested I grew my hair and stopped having skinhead cuts, lo and behold nothing doing now. Oh yeh, I'd forgotten about MOD plod, been stopped a few times by that lot Me too, occupational hazard in dockyards, they have/had so little to do. |
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Post by raythesailor on Apr 2, 2020 20:50:54 GMT
Oh yeh, I'd forgotten about MOD plod, been stopped a few times by that lot Me too, occupational hazard in dockyards, they have/had so little to do. Some years ago I sailed with a Army Helicopter Pilot in the Sound, Plymouth He told me the story that he had to fly a General from London down to the West Country for a week end joint services conference. They landed in the Dock Yard, and the General was met by a Admiral with all the protocol that you would expect for such an occasion. When the ceremonies were complete the MOD Police turned up and said “Sorry Sir. You can not leave that Chopper here” ”Why not asked an indignant Admiral”. “Security” sir replied the officer. The now red faced Admiral said “Security? This is Her Majesty’s Dockyard. I have Nuclear Submarines, Frigates, a Bloody Aircraft Carrier and probably the best Security in the Western World. What do you mean Security?” “That May be Admiral” said the officer. “But when the ratings return to base on Saturday night from the Barbican they will Rip The Fu#£@&g Thing Apart. The Admiral thought for a second and then said” Probably not a bad idea to park some where else.” |
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Post by elystokie on Apr 2, 2020 20:55:06 GMT
Me too, occupational hazard in dockyards, they have/had so little to do. Some years ago I sailed with a Army Helicopter Pilot in the Sound, Plymouth He told me the story that he had to fly a General from London down to the West Country for a week end joint services conference. They landed in the Dock Yard, and the General was met by a Admiral with all the protocol that you would expect for such an occasion. When the ceremonies were complete the MOD Police turned up and said “Sorry Sir. You can not leave that Chopper here” ”Why not asked an indignant Admiral”. “Security” sir replied the officer. The now red faced Admiral said “Security? This is Her Majesty’s Dockyard. I have Nuclear Submarines, Frigates, a Bloody Aircraft Carrier and probably the best Security in the Western World. What do you mean Security?” “That May be Admiral” said the officer. “But when the ratings return to base on Saturday night from the Barbican they will Rip The Fu#£@&g Thing Apart. The Admiral thought for a second and then said” Probably not a bad idea to park some where else.” Lol scurrilous rumours |
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Post by danceswithclams on Apr 2, 2020 22:39:57 GMT
On a journey back darn sarf one Sunday evening as I was passing the Oxford area I needed to pee so pulled into a 'services' (it was basically an extended petrol station). I noticed when I went in that you could buy a pastie and heat it up in a microwave, quite a new concept at the time for these places. So I thought I'd be clever and have a pastie heat up in the microwave whilst I used the facilities. I was about 15 miles down the road and just finishing the last of it when I realised I'd just walked out of the toilet, picked up the pastie from the microwave and walked out without paying for it At that time the Newbury bypass hadn't yet been built and you could pretty much guarantee a jam of at least half an hour there regardless of when you went through, I spent the whole time worrying about my 'stolen' pastie. At the very end of the jam I was just going over the last roundabout when blue lights started flashing in my rear view mirror, I pulled into a bus stop to let them pass and they pulled in behind me! It seemed my worst fears were about to be confirmed. I got out of the car ready to confess and offer to pay when one of the coppers asked me if I knew one of my brake lights wasn't working I can't be the only one who read this in the voice of Alan Partridge? |
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Post by xchpotter on Apr 3, 2020 0:12:15 GMT
Stopped in the 80’s by Staffordshire's finest traffic department. I was in my mates car as a passenger when he foolishly overtook on the approach to a zebra crossing in Newcastle. Unfortunately as he did so coming directly towards us was a 3.0i Vauxhall Senator jam sandwich. My mate panicked and floored his car and I looked over as the cop car had gone past us only to see it swing around like something out of Starsky and Hutch, all lights and sirens blazing.
Anyway my mate thinks he can outrun this Senator in his Morris Ital and we get into what turned out to be a short lived, yet thrilling chase. The Senator was so close up our arse you couldn’t see it’s infamous cheese grater style radiator grill and we were really under pressure. I told my mate to give it up and he did.
So he pulled over, as did the cops, and we were “helped” from his car. Once the coppers realised the car wasn’t stolen we both got a massive bollocking plus he got a ticket as well.
We were never going to get away but for a few seconds the Adrenalin rush was mental and on reflection, the coppers could’ve done worse. I have to laugh about it now.
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