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EEFC
Oct 1, 2020 22:31:21 GMT
Post by cheeesfreeex on Oct 1, 2020 22:31:21 GMT
Penalties...
1 miss... Assassin 6 goal... Cheees 5 goal... Northy 6 goal... MSal 1 miss... Pearo
Me mate will roll the Villa pens..
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Post by cheeesfreeex on Oct 1, 2020 23:08:53 GMT
Villains' Pens.. One dice rolled....
3.. miss 6.. goal 5.. goal 1.. miss 2.. miss
EEFC win 3 vs 2 on penalties.. Following a tense 3v3 on the night in the ninety...
Stats ratings more factoids and that to follow... Obviously Quality Transferrable Ohmmmm... ...going on.. etc...
We're through.. In the Prem instead of Villa, leave the Cup to the pros. I'll have to check Prem fix tures etc...
Who've we got Hovewegoht.. Careful in the post match celebrations... We'll be back...
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Post by chuffedstokie on Oct 2, 2020 5:20:31 GMT
Tense nervy affairs are pens but the sense of relief after a successful campaign is palpable. No champers for me just another big cloudy lemonade and some cheese and biscuits, maybe a pickled onion. Great stuff everyone. I'm knackered.
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Post by thequietman on Oct 2, 2020 9:36:06 GMT
Well, what a marvellous result. Well done all.
I'm not expecting a high rating personally. Didn't see much of the ball, but there will be plenty of Villains walking with a limp for a few days.
I did contribute to the victory in my own way. No coincidence that two of the Villain penalty takers were on crutches and their shots never even reached as far as Cheeeese between the sticks.
Kudos to the gaffer - superb team selection, tactics etc. And using the Om to deflect shots up into the ether - brilliant.
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EEFC
Oct 2, 2020 10:15:18 GMT
Post by bucknall67 on Oct 2, 2020 10:15:18 GMT
Cooper67 is still out injured.
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Post by murphthesurf on Oct 4, 2020 11:54:50 GMT
Tense nervy affairs are pens but the sense of relief after a successful campaign is palpable. No champers for me just another big cloudy lemonade and some cheese and biscuits, maybe a pickled onion. Great stuff everyone. I'm knackered. Knackered? That's NUTHIN'. At least you can still walk. (**Ooo, she's in a REALLY bad mood, they thought.**) No, no - it's my own fault, Chuff - I shouldn't have tried to keep up with Dees on that great run. I pulled a muscle in my thigh and even after resting for a couple of days I'm still suffering and every movement is making me wince. Vlad is going to give me a physio massage in a bit when he's finished supervising the CM rangers' fire alarm procedure - he's just got to get the drawbridge up then it'll be time for me to greet him with "Я надеюсь, что ваши руки теплые, товарищ."
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Post by chuffedstokie on Oct 4, 2020 22:53:23 GMT
Tense nervy affairs are pens but the sense of relief after a successful campaign is palpable. No champers for me just another big cloudy lemonade and some cheese and biscuits, maybe a pickled onion. Great stuff everyone. I'm knackered. Knackered? That's NUTHIN'. At least you can still walk. (**Ooo, she's in a REALLY bad mood, they thought.**) No, no - it's my own fault, Chuff - I shouldn't have tried to keep up with Dees on that great run. I pulled a muscle in my thigh and even after resting for a couple of days I'm still suffering and every movement is making me wince. Vlad is going to give me a physio massage in a bit when he's finished supervising the CM rangers' fire alarm procedure - he's just got to get the drawbridge up then it'll be time for me to greet him with "Я надеюсь, что ваши руки теплые, товарищ." Using my extensive (🤣) medical skills murph I can recommend the magic sponge treatment, failing that an injection of something using one of those dirty great big needle things into the affected area (s). Combined with the massage you'll be soon be chasing Deeside all over the place without any problems. This isn't a fully tried and tested procedure but it's got to be worth a try. You'll be on the scoresheet next time out, trust me. 👍⚽️
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Post by Deleted on Oct 5, 2020 8:23:34 GMT
If that long, twisting run had lasted another 2 or 3 yards I'd have collapsed face down as I was absolutely knackered even by the time I reached the halfway line. It may have looked graceful (?) , purposeful (?), and determined (?) but truth is I was running on empty for the last 10 yards (or should that be metres ?). Thankfully the goal was just about at the limit of my range so I just closed my eyes, toe-ended the ball and hoped......and amazingly it flew into the postage stamp to the goalies right.
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Post by murphthesurf on Oct 5, 2020 19:24:42 GMT
If that long, twisting run had lasted another 2 or 3 yards I'd have collapsed face down as I was absolutely knackered even by the time I reached the halfway line. It may have looked graceful (?) , purposeful (?), and determined (?) but truth is I was running on empty for the last 10 yards (or should that be metres ?). Thankfully the goal was just about at the limit of my range so I just closed my eyes, toe-ended the ball and hoped......and amazingly it flew into the postage stamp to the goalies right. Bravo, Dees, it was a sizzler! The whole thing, run + shot, reminded me exactly of Geoff Hurst netting our 4th at Wembley in '66. Great result, folks. Played, Dees, Gaffer and Assassin (great assist, Chuff) for the three goals, and congrats to the pen takers for their nerves of steel. I don't mind admitting I couldn't have taken a penalty now I'm off the juice. Onward!
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Post by murphthesurf on Oct 5, 2020 19:46:25 GMT
Knackered? That's NUTHIN'. At least you can still walk. (**Ooo, she's in a REALLY bad mood, they thought.**) Using my extensive (🤣) medical skills murph I can recommend the magic sponge treatment, failing that an injection of something using one of those dirty great big needle things into the affected area (s). Combined with the massage you'll be soon be chasing Deeside all over the place without any problems. This isn't a fully tried and tested procedure but it's got to be worth a try. You'll be on the scoresheet next time out, trust me. 👍⚽️ NEEDLES??? NO CHANCE, my little slice of laverbread. Vlad knows full well that anybody who comes anywhere near me with a syringe or even a photo of one will be on the first flight back to Vladisoddinvostok right rapid, whether they came from there in the first place or not, izznit, boyo. Actually, glad to say that the massage did the trick. That's one ex-cossack who knows what he's doing.
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Post by pearo on Oct 7, 2020 8:02:33 GMT
Sorry I missed my penalty guys, went for the Panenka and got a pancake, I will come back stronger
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Post by murphthesurf on Oct 7, 2020 12:19:32 GMT
Sorry I missed my penalty guys, went for the Panenka and got a pancake, I will come back stronger The Gaffer usually has anyone who misses a pen in for extra training, Peardrops. Let us know if he cracks the whip. (Mind you, one or two, mentioning no names, Fel, would probably quite like that..... )
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Post by pearo on Oct 7, 2020 14:16:15 GMT
Sorry I missed my penalty guys, went for the Panenka and got a pancake, I will come back stronger The Gaffer usually has anyone who misses a pen in for extra training, Peardrops. Let us know if he cracks the whip. (Mind you, one or two, mentioning no names, Fel, would probably quite like that..... ) You’re quite right Murph, he’s had me and the Assassin in shooting the balls off gnats with a peashooter, ( note to the wise, if Assassin is this good with a peashooter God help the opposition if he ever gets an AK47 )
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EEFC
Oct 10, 2020 14:14:49 GMT
Post by murphthesurf on Oct 10, 2020 14:14:49 GMT
Yo dudes Anybody know yet what the Gaffer's ratings for us last time out are? On tenter'ooks.
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Post by cheeesfreeex on Oct 11, 2020 21:56:33 GMT
Yo dudes Anybody know yet what the Gaffer's ratings for us last time out are? On tenter'ooks. Oh Murph the ratings slipped me mind.. Too busy transferring the om to the Prem in AV's place... And look what they done did last sunday... I'll get to the ratings.. i've been whittlin' the bespoke dice ready fo the weekend... 3 Die Six faces to each...... Score Dice: 0 1 1 2 3 3+{roll again} Type of Goal Dice: 1. Tap in {someone else did all the work} 2. Header off a corner 3. Direct Free Kick 4. off an indirect free kick 5. Worldy 6. Penalty Disciplinary/Injury Diice to be rolled if we're losing half/full time..... 1. Yellow 2. Yellow Yellow {two in the book} 3. Sending Off 4. Injury {enforced sub} 5. Two Injuries requiring treatment 6. Oranges & Magik sponge Carry on regardless.... .. or somesuch {still up for comment/amendment}.. And me cat has had a terrible bout of fleas to contend with.... I'll be at it...
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Post by murphthesurf on Oct 12, 2020 13:00:41 GMT
Yo dudes Anybody know yet what the Gaffer's ratings for us last time out are? On tenter'ooks. Oh Murph the ratings slipped me mind.. Too busy transferring the om to the Prem in AV's place... And look what they done did last sunday... I'll get to the ratings.. i've been whittlin' the bespoke dice ready fo the weekend... 3 Die Six faces to each...... Score Dice: 0 1 1 2 3 3+{roll again} Type of Goal Dice: 1. Tap in {someone else did all the work} 2. Header off a corner 3. Direct Free Kick 4. off an indirect free kick 5. Worldy 6. Penalty Disciplinary/Injury Diice to be rolled if we're losing half/full time..... 1. Yellow 2. Yellow Yellow {two in the book} 3. Sending Off 4. Injury {enforced sub} 5. Two Injuries requiring treatment 6. Oranges & Magik sponge Carry on regardless.... .. or somesuch {still up for comment/amendment}.. And me cat has had a terrible bout of fleas to contend with.... I'll be at it... Thx Boss. Whenever you have time with the ratings, much appreciated. Please tell your boy that Tiddles from CM sends him lots of XOXOXOXOXs. Ta ever so.
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Post by cheeesfreeex on Oct 12, 2020 17:57:55 GMT
The Ratings vs Villains are in:
A new system of Ratings Dice was trialled...
Ratings Die: 3 4 4 5 5 6 Score Die: 0 0 1 1 2 3+ Win Enhanced Ratings Die: 1 1 1 1 2 2
Three Dice Rolled plus 2 points for a goal, 1 point for an assist/penalty. minus 1 point for a booking/injury, minus 2 for a sending off/enforced sub... {If the opposition score more 4 or more goals a card will be drawn for a Scorer of an Own Goal, minus 2 points to that player's rating...}
To whit:
Cheees rolled 6 for performance +1 for the penalty and +1 for the Captaincy Rated 8 Northy rated 6 Murph rated 8 Deeside rolled 10 for performance +2 for the solo worldy rated 12* Felonious 6 Quietman 5 Pearo 9 Badger 7 Chuffed rolled 6 for performance +1 for the assist rated 7 Assassin rolled 8 for performance +2 for the goal rated 10 MSal 7
MOM: Deeside Deeside... {Some interest from the Drug testing auths with a rating of 12 out of 10... But put down to teething issues with the rubik of the dice, so no repercussions at the moment....} Deeside carries a Joker into the next match...
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Post by Deleted on Oct 12, 2020 19:06:32 GMT
The Ratings vs Villains are in: A new system of Ratings Dice was trialled... Ratings Die: 3 4 4 5 5 6 Score Die: 0 0 1 1 2 3+ Win Enhanced Ratings Die: 1 1 1 1 2 2 Three Dice Rolled plus 2 points for a goal, 1 point for an assist/penalty. minus 1 point for a booking/injury, minus 2 for a sending off/enforced sub... {If the opposition score more 4 or more goals a card will be drawn for a Scorer of an Own Goal, minus 2 points to that player's rating...} To whit: Cheees rolled 6 for performance +1 for the penalty and +1 for the Captaincy Rated 8
Northy rated 6 Murph rated 8 Deeside rolled 10 for performance +2 for the solo worldy rated 12* Felonious 6 Quietman 5 Pearo 9 Badger 7 Chuffed rolled 6 for performance +1 for the assist rated 7Assassin rolled 8 for performance +2 for the goal rated 10 MSal 7MOM: Deeside Deeside... {Some interest from the Drug testing auths with a rating of 12 out of 10... But put down to teething issues with the rubik of the dice, so no repercussions at the moment....} Deeside carries a Joker into the next match... Nah, not guilty Gaffer - they probably noticed a bit of dodgy looking yellow powder around my gums and down my shirt front when I came off the pitch at the end of the game. I do have to admit to having a few crafty sherbet fountains during the game - I think I'd finished one just before I set off on the run for my goal - the sherbet was in full fizz mode at the time. Exhibit A m'Lud !
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Post by cheeesfreeex on Oct 12, 2020 20:05:28 GMT
Internal..
A reminder of the rules of engagement..
"Football is a game you play with your mind. {Your feet are just tools}.."
Johan Cruyff
A game requiring Cards and Dice, and a decent playing surface.. {note pad and pencil handy too}
A Turn of the Cards and a Roll of the Dice...
"It's a game of two halves.."
Unattributed...
Each half a Roll of The Score Die will determine the number of goals scored for each team...
Score Die: 0 0 1 1 2 3+ {Roll Again}
A shuffle and split of the playing cards determines the scorers of the EEFC goal{s}...
Each EEFC player is represented by a playing card in the suit of Clubs.. currently:
Jack of Clubs {Keeper}: Cheees 2 Clubs: Northy 4 Clubs: Murph 3 Clubs: Deeside 5 Clubs: Felonious 6 Clubs: Pearo 7 Clubs: Quietman 8 Clubs: Badger 10 Clubs: Chuffed 9 Clubs: MSal Ace Clubs: Assassin
Additional {Court Cards} Captain carries the King Clubs Ongoing Top Scorer carries the Queen Clubs. Previous weeks MOM carries the JoKer
{The additional Court cards give enhanced chances in the shuffle and split for Goalscorer/Assister...} These are withdrawn during Disciplinary Die Procedures {*below}..
The shuffle and split of the Cards reveals the Scorer {+2 on the ratings}, a roll of the Type of Goal die reveals, obviously, what kind of goal it was...
Type of Goal Die: Tap-in, Header off a Corner, off an indirect free kick, Direct Free Kick, Solo Worldy, Penalty.
If the Type of Goal requires an Assist, a further shuffle and cut of the cards indicates the Assistor/ant.... {+1 point added to the rating} {The Goal scorers card{s} are excluded from the Assist shuffle.} A scored Penalty only adds +1 to the rating, the assistor is the player who 'won' the penalty/fouled in the box.. The Penalty Scorer card{s} are included in this sahuffle...
If EEFC are losing half time, and/or lose over the ninety then the Disciplinary/Injury Die comes into play..
Disciplinary/Injury Die: Yellow {-1 in ratings}, Yellow Yellow {-1 -1 two player ratings affected}, Sending Off, Injury-Enforced Substitution, Two Injured players {second injuries to these players = enforced change}, Oranges & Magik Sponge: Carry on Regardless..
A shuffle and cut of the Cards reveals the players affected by the Die {Queen, King, Joker excluded}.
At the conclusion of the Match a Players Rating is determined by a roll of the:
Rating Die, the Score Die, and in a win The Enhanced Win Die plus goals scored and asists, minus disciplinary etc To give a final Rating.. {As per the post above}...
That's it in a nutshell... Bar a bit of imagination and Om...
Next up, next Sunday-ish:
Foxes v EEFC
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Post by murphthesurf on Oct 12, 2020 22:53:18 GMT
The Ratings vs Villains are in: A new system of Ratings Dice was trialled... To whit: Cheees rolled 6 for performance +1 for the penalty and +1 for the Captaincy Rated 8
Northy rated 6 Murph rated 8 Deeside rolled 10 for performance +2 for the solo worldy rated 12* Felonious 6 Quietman 5 Pearo 9 Badger 7 Chuffed rolled 6 for performance +1 for the assist rated 7Assassin rolled 8 for performance +2 for the goal rated 10 MSal 7MOM: Deeside Deeside... I got an 8. 'Appy with that. Level with the gaffer and second only to Assy on 10 and the M-O-M Deester's 12. Thx for the 8 Boss, you're the greatest gaffer in the world. (Lickety lick......)
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Post by thequietman on Oct 13, 2020 11:30:31 GMT
As I suspected, lowest rating of the team.
But it is all about the team after all. The win was paramount. And I collected more Villains' shinpads than I did points so I'm happy with everything. Deeside rightly MOM. Watching his pumping legs go flashing past me up & down the pitch reminded me of a song every time he went on a run. He covered miles, did the lad.
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EEFC
Oct 13, 2020 11:52:26 GMT
Post by Deleted on Oct 13, 2020 11:52:26 GMT
As I suspected, lowest rating of the team. But it is all about the team after all. The win was paramount. And I collected more Villains' shinpads than I did points so I'm happy with everything. Deeside rightly MOM. Watching his pumping legs go flashing past me up & down the pitch reminded me of a song every time he went on a run. He covered miles, did the lad.
Thanks for the compliments JD, those sherbet fountains are very addictive and do give me an energy burst every now and again. I've just looked at your avatar again - do you play in your magic beer boots or do you have footie boots ? I can't say I've really noticed when we've been on the pitch.
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Post by thequietman on Oct 13, 2020 12:14:01 GMT
As I suspected, lowest rating of the team. But it is all about the team after all. The win was paramount. And I collected more Villains' shinpads than I did points so I'm happy with everything. Deeside rightly MOM. Watching his pumping legs go flashing past me up & down the pitch reminded me of a song every time he went on a run. He covered miles, did the lad.
Thanks for the compliments JD, those sherbet fountains are very addictive and do give me an energy burst every now and again. I've just looked at your avatar again - do you play in your magic beer boots or do you have footie boots ? I can't say I've really noticed when we've been on the pitch. Ah no. My footwear alters from match to match but the magic beer boots are reserved for post-match celebrations. Two clicks of the heels, say "I wish I was in Kansas / Leeds / on the same planet as everyone else" and hey presto! there's a flash of light, a puff of smoke, and about a week later I magically arrive home.
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Post by chuffedstokie on Oct 13, 2020 16:01:04 GMT
Internal.. A reminder of the rules of engagement.. "Football is a game you play with your mind. {Your feet are just tools}.." Johan Cruyff A game requiring Cards and Dice, and a decent playing surface.. {note pad and pencil handy too} A Turn of the Cards and a Roll of the Dice... "It's a game of two halves.." Unattributed... Each half a Roll of The Score Die will determine the number of goals scored for each team... Score Die: 0 0 1 1 2 3+ {Roll Again} A shuffle and split of the playing cards determines the scorers of the EEFC goal{s}... Each EEFC player is represented by a playing card in the suit of Clubs.. currently: Jack of Clubs {Keeper}: Cheees 2 Clubs: Northy 4 Clubs: Murph 3 Clubs: Deeside 5 Clubs: Felonious 6 Clubs: Pearo 7 Clubs: Quietman 8 Clubs: Badger 10 Clubs: Chuffed 9 Clubs: MSal Ace Clubs: Assassin Additional {Court Cards} Captain carries the King Clubs Ongoing Top Scorer carries the Queen Clubs. Previous weeks MOM carries the JoKer {The additional Court cards give enhanced chances in the shuffle and split for Goalscorer/Assister...} These are withdrawn during Disciplinary Die Procedures {*below}.. The shuffle and split of the Cards reveals the Scorer {+2 on the ratings}, a roll of the Type of Goal die reveals, obviously, what kind of goal it was... Type of Goal Die: Tap-in, Header of a Corner, off an indirect free kick, Direct Free Kick, Solo Worldy, Penalty. If the Type of Goal requires an Assist, a further shuffle and cut of the cards indicates the Assistor/ant.... {+1 point added to the rating} {The Goal scorers card{s} are excluded from the Assist shuffle.} A scored Penalty only adds +1 to the rating, the assistor is the player who 'won' the penalty/fouled in the box.. The Penalty Scorer card{s} are included in this sahuffle... If EEFC are losing half time, and/or lose over the ninety then the Disciplinary/Injury Die comes into play.. Disciplinary/Injury Die: Yellow {-1 in ratings}, Yellow Yellow {-1 -1 two player ratings affected}, Sending Off, Injury-Enforced Substitution, Two Injured players {second injuries to these players = enforced change}, Oranges & Magik Sponge: Carry on Regardless.. A shuffle and cut of the Cards reveals the players affected by the Die {Queen, King, Joker excluded}. At the conclusion of the Match a Players Rating is determined by a roll of the: Rating Die, the Score Die, and in a win The Enhanced Win Die plus goals scored and asists, minus disciplinary etc To give a final Rating.. {As per the post above}... That's it in a nutshell... Bar a bit of imagination an Om... Next up, next Sunday-ish: Foxes v EEFC And who exactly said nogger was an easy game, Hah!!.
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Post by cheeesfreeex on Oct 13, 2020 21:31:15 GMT
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Post by cheeesfreeex on Oct 13, 2020 21:47:48 GMT
And so on to the Foxes... Thought it best to co-ordinate the fixture with the real SCFC so sat 3pm ish for the turn of the cards, roll of the dice... Tweaks not changes.. Chuffed moved to the no. 10 role, Badger on the wing{back}... Lots of shouting, baying etc.... Foxes v EEFC
Saturday 17/10/20 Cheees {Jack Clubs} Northy {2 Clubs} Murphs {4 Clubs} Deeeside {3 Clubs + Joker} Felonious {5 Clubs} Quietman {7 Clubs} Pearo {6 Clubs + King Captaincy} Badger {8 Clubs} Chuffed {10 Clubs} Assassin {Ace Clubs} MSal {9 Clubs + Queen Clubs {last season's top scorer}
Skeletal/Ghostly/Tentative bench: Batth HarryB RogerJ etc... A tune for a training in the interim.... Ommmmm....
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Post by chuffedstokie on Oct 14, 2020 6:15:00 GMT
Looking forward to giving the foxes hell (ish) in the 10 slot,ghosting in and out and using all those crafty tactics and skills honed at the expense of the poor unfortunates unlucky enough to have faced us previously. By my reckoning the job involves not being marked at all therefore the freedom to score a hat full. I'll do my best. Look out foxes here we come. {ish} COYMEEFC.
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Post by thehartshillbadger on Oct 14, 2020 6:19:13 GMT
How are our forwards aerial capabilities. I live for getting chalk on me boots and delivering dangerous outswingers. Chuffed should bag a hatful if prowling just outside the D for any scuffed clearances! Got a good feeling about this one!
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Post by murphthesurf on Oct 14, 2020 7:22:09 GMT
The Ratings vs Villains are in: A new system of Ratings Dice was trialled... To whit: Cheees rolled 6 for performance +1 for the penalty and +1 for the Captaincy Rated 8
Northy rated 6 Murph rated 8 Deeside rolled 10 for performance +2 for the solo worldy rated 12* Felonious 6 Quietman 5 Pearo 9 Badger 7 Chuffed rolled 6 for performance +1 for the assist rated 7Assassin rolled 8 for performance +2 for the goal rated 10 MSal 7MOM: Deeside Deeside... I got an 8. 'Appy with that. Level with the gaffer and second only to Assy on 10 and the M-O-M Deester's 12. Thx for the 8 Boss, you're the greatest gaffer in the world. (Lickety lick......) Oh, sh*t! After I did all that braggin' about bein' 'appy with me score, I've just noticed that Peardrops got a 9 rating! How did I miss THAT? Sorry mate! xxx (Yep, I know, I know.......... Specsavers.........)
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Post by murphthesurf on Oct 14, 2020 7:25:57 GMT
Looking forward to giving the foxes hell (ish) in the 10 slot,ghosting in and out and using all those crafty tactics and skills honed at the expense of the poor unfortunates unlucky enough to have faced us previously. By my reckoning the job involves not being marked at all therefore the freedom to score a hat full. I'll do my best. Look out foxes here we come. {ish} COYMEEFC. Yeah. Tally 'o !!!!! (**Blows one of those annoying little toot-toot-toot 'orn thingies.**)
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