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Post by skip on Dec 1, 2019 3:12:02 GMT
It's time to get thinking like the best television detective ever.
I seriously cannot believe that MoN, Jones, Rowett, ok, we'll stop there for now, but I cannot believe they're all totally shit at their jobs.
So, what is going wrong? Three weeks ago I honestly thought Stoke would boss ten wins between now, and say, February, and be at the very least comfortably away from the bottom. But after today, I'm back to thinking we're going down.
So what is the problem and where is the evidence? Who is the guilty party? Some fucker has killed Stoke City, at least the version of Stoke that was comfortably punching above its weight, to now performing below itself, our expectations and the clubs financial clout.
So, come one, footballing sleuths, who killed Stoke, with what and how?
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Post by rawli on Dec 1, 2019 4:59:15 GMT
Tony Scholes. With a process. In the boardroom.
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Post by sheikhmomo on Dec 1, 2019 6:56:49 GMT
I used to like The Chinese Detective with David Yip.
Underrated.
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Post by pottarius on Dec 1, 2019 7:08:38 GMT
I used to like The Chinese Detective with David Yip. Underrated. For Stoke its now its going to be a Shoestring budget, anything else would be Pie in the Sky
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Post by Deleted on Dec 1, 2019 7:10:24 GMT
The owners are 100% to blame.
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Post by Goonie on Dec 1, 2019 8:21:48 GMT
Too many chiefs
Hughes bought badly Lambert then brings in a few Rowett sets the team up his way with his acquisitions Jones then comes in with his Diamond Obsession and recruits to that
We end up with a mish-mash of players only capable of playing one way, confusion and devoid of any cohesion on the pitch and Lord knows what it's like off it with everyone being subject to different contracts breeding jealousy and disharmony
In short: Poor managerial appointments Poor player appointments Poor recruitment process: who advices the CEO and the board as to whether the players targeted are fit for purpose?
Personally I think we need a Head of Football to scrutinise the manager and perform our due dilligence otherwise you end up with the squad we have
MON will turn this around if he can bring in a balanced squad and shift the dross
With FFP around the corner I'd say it's a 3-5 year process
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Post by str8outtahampton on Dec 1, 2019 11:24:21 GMT
Not quite Columbo, but I give you the latest iteration in the excellent "Gregory and Hogan" franchise.
"Etebo and Badou".
Still set in the mean streets of the 28th precinct in Philadelphia.
Etebo is a no-nonsense gritty cop who drinks too much, has a fondness for jazz, and a disastrous personal life, but invariably gets results. He is typically within an inch of beating a confession out of a perp.
Badou's solution to an alcohol dependency is a ket addiction. He is gay and has a secret crush on Etebo. (Actually it's reciprocated but unspoken). He also has a fondness for jazz, and a disastrous personal life, having been divorced by an embittered wife. He never sees his kids, who hate him. A results copper, constantly bending the rules and failing to file his reports on time.
Both have been mysteriously suspended from the force, although it may be related to an incident where a perp was (allegedly) tortured in the interrogation room. The perp sadly turned out to be the Mayor's nephew.
Both have decided to go vigilante, and are usually to be seen at 3.00 am getting loaded in a sleazy bar - before cruising the streets of downtown Philly dispensing summary justice to low life bad-asses.
The opening credits are our two heroes in a 67 Chevy Impala, skidding round corners in the rain. The theme tune is Ray Charles - in The Heat Of The Night.
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Post by Edward Tattsyrup on Dec 1, 2019 11:35:29 GMT
The owners are 100% to blame. Whilst I agree with the sentiment. We have a group of players who are all massively under performing, our current predicament lies with them, they all need to look in the mirror as they will be the ones responsible for our relegation.
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Post by maninasuitcase on Dec 1, 2019 11:40:23 GMT
I love watching columbo but even Peter Falk would baulk at the mystery of Stoke.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 1, 2019 11:44:01 GMT
The owners are 100% to blame. Whilst I agree with the sentiment. We have a group of players who are all massively under performing, our current predicament lies with them, they all need to look in the mirror as they will be the ones responsible for our relegation. The group of players you refer to were recruited by a transfer process that has seen us from 9th in the PL to bottom of the Championship. They have chosen the managers and they have allowed them to recruit these players at premium prices, following on from what can only be described as a confused policy in the Premier league. All roads lead back to them I'm afraid. They are the only constant left in the filthy equation.
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Post by LankyPotter on Dec 1, 2019 11:46:41 GMT
The owners are 100% to blame. Whilst I agree with the sentiment. We have a group of players who are all massively under performing, our current predicament lies with them, they all need to look in the mirror as they will be the ones responsible for our relegation. I think that they have been performing at this level for long enough to warrant it being said that this is actually the level of their playing ability.
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Post by prudhoesnose on Dec 1, 2019 11:49:38 GMT
It fascinates me how quickly a new signing loses all form and confidence when they join Stoke (or simply just disappear without trace. i.e Tommy Smith). Can only assume it’s all a bit toxic in that dressing room.
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Post by Scrotnig on Dec 1, 2019 11:51:33 GMT
I actually think this is beyond saving now. Not even King Tone could sort it.
Too many expensive, useless players on huge long contracts.
My fear is, we won't be able to fix it until all those contracts have expired and they are thus gone whether they like it or not. By that point we will of course be in League 1 or even League 2. Then we have to start again, from scratch, but I think by that point the Coates family will have bailed and a Bury / Bolton scenario becomes likely.
Currently things are bleak, as bleak as they have ever been and then some. Make no mistake about that.
Our new manager is clearly not going to bring about the miracle turnaround we all hoped for, and let's face it with the current squad that was always a long shot.
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Post by pavel on Dec 1, 2019 11:56:46 GMT
I think Midsomer Murders fits the bill, it's crap, you know the plot, you know the guilty parties and know how it will end even before it begins, sums Stoke up to a tee.
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Post by Caerwrangonpotter on Dec 1, 2019 12:03:49 GMT
Too much money pissed away Too many square pegs & round holes Too much complacency Too much blinkered observations from the Towers Of Coates Who to blame?......
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Post by rawli on Dec 1, 2019 12:06:59 GMT
I used to like The Chinese Detective with David Yip. Underrated. He got so he couldn't go on set though.
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Post by rawli on Dec 1, 2019 12:08:13 GMT
I love watching columbo but even Peter Falk would baulk at the mystery of Stoke. I like to keep an eye on it when it's on.
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Post by trickydicky73 on Dec 1, 2019 12:15:24 GMT
I used to like The Chinese Detective with David Yip. Underrated. He got so he couldn't go on set though. Beat me to it! 😁
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Post by peekay67 on Dec 1, 2019 13:28:29 GMT
Vokes 9m. Good god.
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Post by stantheman on Dec 1, 2019 13:49:49 GMT
Not quite Columbo, but I give you the latest iteration in the excellent "Gregory and Hogan" franchise. "Etebo and Badou". Still set in the mean streets of the 28th precinct in Philadelphia. Etebo is a no-nonsense gritty cop who drinks too much, has a fondness for jazz, and a disastrous personal life, but invariably gets results. He is typically within an inch of beating a confession out of a perp. Badou's solution to an alcohol dependency is a ket addiction. He is gay and has a secret crush on Etebo. (Actually it's reciprocated but unspoken). He also has a fondness for jazz, and a disastrous personal life, having been divorced by an embittered wife. He never sees his kids, who hate him. A results copper, constantly bending the rules and failing to file his reports on time. Both have been mysteriously suspended from the force, although it may be related to an incident where a perp was (allegedly) tortured in the interrogation room. The perp sadly turned out to be the Mayor's nephew. Both have decided to go vigilante, and are usually to be seen at 3.00 am getting loaded in a sleazy bar - before cruising the streets of downtown Philly dispensing summary justice to low life bad-asses. The opening credits are our two heroes in a 67 Chevy Impala, skidding round corners in the rain. The theme tune is Ray Charles - in The Heat Of The Night. Best post since 'I love Glen Whelan' frequented this board!
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Post by Deleted on Dec 1, 2019 14:43:48 GMT
It's time to get thinking like the best television detective ever. I seriously cannot believe that MoN, Jones, Rowett, ok, we'll stop there for now, but I cannot believe they're all totally shit at their jobs. So, what is going wrong? Three weeks ago I honestly thought Stoke would boss ten wins between now, and say, February, and be at the very least comfortably away from the bottom. But after today, I'm back to thinking we're going down. So what is the problem and where is the evidence? Who is the guilty party? Some fucker has killed Stoke City, at least the version of Stoke that was comfortably punching above its weight, to now performing below itself, our expectations and the clubs financial clout. So, come one, footballing sleuths, who killed Stoke, with what and how? I think it's probably the same problems as there were when Arnie decided to want out.....he could see that there was no forward ambition in the club Fortunately for him, he was talented enough to be wanted elsewhere....these fuckers we have now can see theres no seriously credible ambition in the club so cant be arsed to get motivated Bit like me on matchday
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Post by benjaminbiscuit on Dec 1, 2019 16:27:35 GMT
Sean Taylor here Police 5
Police are looking for this man weasel like appearance . Masquerades as Chief executive , squandered hundreds of millions revenue over ten years , borrowed £190m and has no assets to show for it , drove away thousands of customers , lost £100m revenue annually , three disasters as managerial appointments , destroyed the P&L and Balance sheet off he 30th wealthiest football club in the world , rarely seen in public now things are not so good but can be recognised by catch phrase like
Nothing wrong with the process Jesse now thats ambition “‘arnie”’ FFP is unfair because I fucked up time and and time and time again
Police have urged the public to ring 999 rather approach this man as he a expert at transferring accountability and you may well finish up being arrested for gross incompetence while he swans off
keep em peeled
Sean
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Post by maninasuitcase on Dec 1, 2019 16:35:56 GMT
Sean Taylor here Police 5 Police are looking for this man weasel like appearance . Masquerades as Chief executive , squandered hundreds of millions revenue over ten years , borrowed £190m and has no assets to show for it , drove away thousands of customers , lost £100m revenue annually , three disasters as managerial appointments , destroyed the P&L and Balance sheet off he 30th wealthiest football club in the world , rarely seen in public now things are not so good but can be recognised by catch phrase like Nothing wrong with the process Jesse now thats ambition “‘arnie”’ FFP is unfair because I fucked up time and and time and time again Police have urged the public to ring 999 rather approach this man as he a expert at transferring accountability and you may well finish up being arrested for gross incompetence while he swans off keep em peeled Sean It was Shaw Taylor 🙄
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Post by Scrotnig on Dec 1, 2019 17:38:44 GMT
Fail!
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Post by benjaminbiscuit on Dec 1, 2019 17:57:53 GMT
Sean Taylor here Police 5 Police are looking for this man weasel like appearance . Masquerades as Chief executive , squandered hundreds of millions revenue over ten years , borrowed £190m and has no assets to show for it , drove away thousands of customers , lost £100m revenue annually , three disasters as managerial appointments , destroyed the P&L and Balance sheet off he 30th wealthiest football club in the world , rarely seen in public now things are not so good but can be recognised by catch phrase like Nothing wrong with the process Jesse now thats ambition “‘arnie”’ FFP is unfair because I fucked up time and and time and time again Police have urged the public to ring 999 rather approach this man as he a expert at transferring accountability and you may well finish up being arrested for gross incompetence while he swans off keep em peeled Sean It was Shaw Taylor 🙄 Thanks and apologies
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Post by wagsastokie on Dec 1, 2019 18:21:32 GMT
Tony pulis In the shower With a towel
Mark Hughes In his office With his ego
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Post by Miles Offside on Dec 1, 2019 19:10:50 GMT
It's time to get thinking like the best television detective ever. I seriously cannot believe that MoN, Jones, Rowett, ok, we'll stop there for now, but I cannot believe they're all totally shit at their jobs. So, what is going wrong? Three weeks ago I honestly thought Stoke would boss ten wins between now, and say, February, and be at the very least comfortably away from the bottom. But after today, I'm back to thinking we're going down. So what is the problem and where is the evidence? Who is the guilty party? Some fucker has killed Stoke City, at least the version of Stoke that was comfortably punching above its weight, to now performing below itself, our expectations and the clubs financial clout. So, come one, footballing sleuths, who killed Stoke, with what and how? Yesterday, we had the wrong players in the wrong line-up. Over the past three years there's been a fortune wasted on fees and contracts on players who've drained the spirit out of the club.
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Post by samstokie1 on Dec 1, 2019 19:46:06 GMT
Hughes to blame if not the board because he was manager when the main 3 players we talk about came in, and general shite that resulted in him getting sacked and us going down, if we had stayed up that season obviously we wouldnt be where we are now, we could have rebuilt with prem money and players etc
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Post by Gifton on Dec 1, 2019 19:53:08 GMT
Too many chiefs Jones then comes in with his Diamond Obsession and recruits to that That's the mad thing though, he didn't recruit players suitable for his diamond system. Ward as a wing back? He just stripped the squad of wingers.
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Post by iglugluk on Dec 1, 2019 20:02:20 GMT
Van der Valk could maybe start investigating the strange case of Martins Indi and his deteriorating form
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