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Post by duckling on Aug 3, 2017 1:23:18 GMT
The anonymity of message boards can be so helpful sometimes.
I haven't shit in almost 4 days. I also have barely farted. I've taken Miralax each of the past two days (I think it's called Movicol in the UK), a stool softener, and two Fiber One cookies yesterday and today. I have been eating a lot of vegetables and fruit, so it's not my diet causing the constipation.
Does anyone have any suggestions? Suggestions must not involve sticking anything up my butt. Also, I don't want it to come on so suddenly that I don't have ample time to find a toilet, nor do I want to have to go several times.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2017 2:31:44 GMT
Chicken phaal and extra large sag aloo.
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Post by duckling on Aug 3, 2017 2:44:37 GMT
Chicken phaal and extra large sag aloo. I'm very spice intolerant unfortunately. I get blisters in my mouth from spicy foods and sometimes vomit. |
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Post by rat on Aug 3, 2017 2:52:03 GMT
Chicken phaal and extra large sag aloo. I'm very spice intolerant unfortunately. I get blisters in my mouth from spicy foods and sometimes vomit. Get Todger to take you out for one of his addiction counselling drinking sessions. That should bore the shit out of you ducky. |
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Post by duckling on Aug 3, 2017 2:56:06 GMT
I ate a bunch of prunes a few hours ago. Aren't those supposed to make you shit fast? Still nothing  |
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Post by kiwistokie on Aug 3, 2017 4:56:25 GMT
some real ale, couple of gallons will fix you, no carbs until it moves
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Post by Northy on Aug 3, 2017 5:01:16 GMT
I ate a bunch of prunes a few hours ago. Aren't those supposed to make you shit fast? Still nothing prune juice |
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Post by duckling on Aug 3, 2017 5:07:50 GMT
I ate a bunch of prunes a few hours ago. Aren't those supposed to make you shit fast? Still nothing prune juice So only the juice version works? |
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Post by duckling on Aug 3, 2017 5:14:25 GMT
Has anyone tried senna? It's supposedly pretty strong, but I'm scared it will be too strong and leave me on the toilet the whole day and/or searching for a toilet. I'm also scared it will be painful.
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Post by Mendicant on Aug 3, 2017 6:04:22 GMT
Keeping well-hydrated helps.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2017 7:24:17 GMT
Try Syrup of Figs if you can get it in a pharmacy. Guaranteed to work !
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Post by Northy on Aug 3, 2017 7:30:38 GMT
So only the juice version works? apparently it works a lot quicker |
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Post by lawrieleslie on Aug 3, 2017 8:56:09 GMT
You are going to literally shit bricks when it comes. Lactulose in solution is very good for constipation and easing the way for those forthcoming bricks.
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Post by raythesailor on Aug 3, 2017 8:57:48 GMT
Go and see a doctor if nothing is working.
It probably isn't but could be serious.
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Post by lordb on Aug 3, 2017 11:09:43 GMT
Cocoa cola might shift it
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Post by Billybigbollox on Aug 3, 2017 11:31:54 GMT
I don't like it if I don't have at least one decent shite a day. You can't beat a good clear out. Have you tried drinking Guinness,( other stout products are available) or eating plenty of fresh summer fruits?
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Post by Northy on Aug 3, 2017 12:00:39 GMT
I don't like it if I don't have at least one decent shite a day. You can't beat a good clear out. Have you tried drinking Guinness,( other stout products are available) or eating plenty of fresh summer fruits? I had 2 pints of Guinness last night with a pie and beans after a run, 6AM this morning daily motions in flow, trouble is I don't get up until 6.30  |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2017 12:05:14 GMT
Squats, physical activity, lots of water, use chia seeds in food , bran .....
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Post by rat on Aug 3, 2017 12:15:38 GMT
Squats, physical activity, lots of water, use chia seeds in food , bran ..... That's odd, cos' it usually ends up coming out of your mouth.  |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2017 12:53:11 GMT
Have you tried Dr Pepper??
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Post by noustie on Aug 3, 2017 13:29:32 GMT
Whenever it happens to me in office hours I sneak in to the work's disabled toilet, grab on to the handrails and get my war face on like I’m birthing John Parkin.
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Post by mrred on Aug 3, 2017 13:35:20 GMT
Women don't shit anyway, what's the problem?
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Post by duckling on Aug 3, 2017 13:40:23 GMT
Women don't shit anyway, what's the problem? That IS the problem. |
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Post by rat on Aug 3, 2017 14:05:53 GMT
Whenever it happens to me in office hours I sneak in to the work's disabled toilet, grab on to the handrails and get my war face on like I’m birthing John Parkin. I've stopped doing that since an old man in a wheelchair tried to ram the disabled bog door off its hinges after I nipped in to one at Manchester airport. He must have seen me and I received dogs abuse and dirty looks from 50 odd. Never been so fucking embarrassed in all my life. |
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Post by heyzeus on Aug 3, 2017 14:21:14 GMT
Whenever it happens to me in office hours I sneak in to the work's disabled toilet, grab on to the handrails and get my war face on like I’m birthing John Parkin. I've stopped doing that since an old man in a wheelchair tried to ram the disabled bog door off its hinges after I nipped in to one at Manchester airport. He must have seen me and I received dogs abuse and dirty looks from 50 odd. Never been so fucking embarrassed in all my life. Not all disabilities are visible friend  I have IBS and carry a card to show to wheelchairs when I use there toilets in a rush |
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Post by samba :) on Aug 3, 2017 15:17:58 GMT
So only the juice version works? if you contemplating that the runs would be better than your current situation drink loadsss of fruit juice. |
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Post by cheeesfreeex on Aug 3, 2017 16:06:10 GMT
A hot bowl of porridge, honeyed, made with milk.
A few prunes optional.
Hot cup of tea.
Always worked a treat for me, abandoned it as a breakfast some time ago ass it worked a little too well.
Jerusalem artichoke soup'll get you blowing like an ocean liner and manning the bilgepump in no time.
After a week or so hammering cocodamol I ended up rayt bunged up.
No amount of hot baths, capsules, unctions, tinctures, straining or owt would shift it.
I ended up confined, in agony on all fours creeping about the place.
In exasperation the missus, a nurse pronounced a manual evacuation would work, and she'd called a friend for the task..
A knock on the door must have shocked me a bit.
It loosened the job, I ran to the bog and went.
You could always make like a mathematician.
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Post by Timmypotter on Aug 3, 2017 16:18:37 GMT
Come and do the 5 mile race at Leek CC tonight. An upcoming race always empties me out in no time. In fact, I'm writing this from the bog - 4th trip today 😃
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Post by Northy on Aug 3, 2017 16:24:49 GMT
Come and do the 5 mile race at Leek CC tonight. An upcoming race always empties me out in no time. In fact, I'm writing this from the bog - 4th trip today 😃 the pre race nerve dumps, even if it's only half a distance youve done before, those portaloos don't half stink |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2017 16:30:26 GMT
Line of the finest will shift anything
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